The Derby Winner is...

After re-reading my earlier Derby post, I realized that I completely copped out and never actually picked a winner. I'm going with Court Vision to take it all, and to make up for the trying to hide behind 6 picks, here are some cheerleader pictures:

Bust out the Bourbon

It's Kentucky Derby time, and that means lots and lots of mint juleps.

• Fresh mint leaves
• white sugar
• bourbon(might I suggest the official derby bourbon: Early Times)

Add a few mint leaves, a couple teaspoons of sugar(if you want to get fancy or you're in a bar, use simple syrup instead), a little bit of ice, and then muddle the shit out of it. Pour in a couple fingers of bourbon, fill with ice and add a sprig of mint as garnish. Enjoy and repeat as necessary. After one or two, its perfectly acceptable to forgo the mint and sugar and just drink the bourbon straight like a real man.

OK, now that we're good and drunk, it's time to partake in the other Kentucky Derby tradition: gambling. While there is no doubt that there are some people that are able to make a living betting on horses and actually know what they're doing when they pick winners(I am not one of these people), the 1st Saturday in May is when everyone else(thats us!) also lays down their bets based on complex formulas derived from methods such as which horse has the coolest name and my personal favorite, throwing darts at a board(only after several mint juleps of course, we're not amateurs here people). Here's the field and their odds, starting from the inside position:

Cool Coal Man (20-1)
Tale of Ekati (15-1)
Anak Nakal (30-1)
Court Vision (20-1)
Eight Belles (20-1)
Z Fortune (15-1)
Big Truck (50-1)
Visionaire (20-1)
Pyro (6-1)
Colonel John (4-1)
Z Humor (30-1)
Smooth Air (20-1)
Bob Black Jack (20-1)
Monba (15-1)
Adriano (30-1)
Denis of Cork (20-1)
Cowboy Cal (20-1)
Recapturetheglory (20-1)
Gayego (15-1)
Big Brown (3-1)

Historically, most of the winners come from the inside half of the track. Since 1900, positions 1 and 5 have been the best, with 12 winners each, but no one has won from the #1 position since 1986. #4 and #10 are next best with 10 winners each. The outside positions are at a clear disadvantage, with positions 17-20 combining for only 2 wins in Derby history. Other good positions are #2 and #8(9 wins apiece) and #3 and #7(8 wins apiece).

The favorites this year are Big Brown and Colonel John. Alot of people just put their money on one of the favorites, assuming the odds makers know more than they do. This is a mistake. Yes the favorites win occasionally, but they also get poor odds, so you'll rarely make any money betting the favorite every time. Don't get me wrong, Big Brown especially is a beast of a horse, but he's inexperienced with only 3 races under his belt(although he won all three, including the Florida Derby). He's also getting a poor pole position, starting from the far outside at position 20. It's been 79 years since a horse won from position 20(and even longer since a horse with only 3 races has won the Derby). He also has had the occasional trouble with cracked hooves, which hasn't slowed him down yet, but Saturday will be the first time any of these horses have gone the full 1 1/4 mile in a race. Combine all that with only getting 3-1 odds, and it's a poor value. You could put your bet on 6 different horses getting 20-1 odds and you'll be getting better odds overall AND have 6 different chances to win. Plus Big Brown sounds like a euphemism for a turd. I ain't betting on anything named after a turd.

Colonel John is getting slightly better odds at 4-1 and actually has a really good pole position(#10) and has a great pedigree for the longer distances and is pretty good safe bet, but if I wanted a safe bet, I'd put my money in CD and go fishing Saturday. We're looking for big money.

Pyro is another safer bet at 6-1. And if you're looking for the media darling, it will probably be the only filly, Eight Belles. There hasn't been a filly in the field since 1999, and only 3 have ever won. Eight Belles definitely has a shot at it, and has proven herself by winning her last 4 races. If she doesn't get to intimidated by the boys, she can do it, but her competition up to this point has been questionable, and I'm just not feeling her.

So here are the horses I'm looking at laying money on*:

Tale of Ekati(15-1) - Great pole position and finished strong to win his final prep race, the Wood Memorial. Since 1970, The Wood Memorial champ has gone on to win the Derby 10 times. More than any other prep race except the Florida Derby. Ekati is also what they call a Dual Qualifier, which means he has a Dosage index of less than 4.0 and weighted on the Experimental Free Handicap within ten pounds of the highweight. What does all that mean? I have no fucking clue, but it's supposed to be a good thing.
Court Vision(20-1) - Has never finished worse than 3rd in his 6 starts and has 3 wins. He can finish great and is also Dual Qualifier. Great pole position at #4.
Z Fortune(15-1) - Good sleeper pick here at the #6 spot
Monba(15-1) - We're getting into the bad part of the pole here, but Monba got a major win at the Blue Grass Stakes and has a great pedigree for the Derby distance.
Denis of Cork(20-1) - Won his first three starts before faltering in his last prep race and finishing fifth. Great pedigree, and is being ridden by last years winning jockey. I'm not real big on Denis of Cork, but I'd still say he's better than a 20-1 shot.
Gayego(15-1) - The #19 spot has never won the Derby, but Gayego is a strong horse. Spent most of his career racing on synthetic surfaces, but won the Arkansas Derby on April 12 while racing on dirt for the first time. The Arkansas is another race that has produced alot of great horses(Curlin, Afleet Alex, and Smarty Jones in recent years). Gayego has never finished worse than second, and is being ridden by Mike Smith who won the 2005 Derby with 50-1 longshot Giacomo. If he was in the first 10 positions, Gayego would probably be my favorite.

Right now Tale of Ekati, Court Vision, and Gayego are my favorites, and Denis of Cork is my least favorite. I really expect the winner to come from this group though. Once you have your pick, don't be afraid to hedge it with some bets on the other horses. When you're getting 15 or 20-1, a couple smaller bets on your 2nd or 3rd choices can mean the difference between losing money and making money.

*Note: 5 out of 5 doctors recommend NOT following this advice. If you value your money at all, you should seriously consider NOT betting on the advice of an anonymous internet blogger.

Big Night for Malkin

Only 10 times in NHL history has a team won their first 7 playoff games of the year. After last nights 5-3 win over the Rangers, the Penguins are number 11. In what will almost certainly jinx them, I also need to mention that 8 of those teams went on to win the Stanley Cup.

It wasn't the prettiest game, and the Penguins high-octane offense spent most of the game back on their heels in their own defensive zone. And while the Rangers controlled most of the game, outshooting the Pens 39-17, Pittsburgh came out on top, thanks to some ridiculously good work in the net by Marc-Andre Fleury and some not so good work by Henrik Lundqvist who gave up 5 goals on those 17 shots. Despite the Rangers continuosly peppering Fleury with pucks, they were still 0-5 on power plays, including two 5-on-3's in the second period. I'm not a hockey expert by any means, but it seems to me a team that makes it to the second round of the playoffs should be able to score some goals when they have a 2 man advantage on the ice. The Penguins on the other hand converted both of their power plays with goals by Evgeni Malkin, who had been announced as a Hart Trophy candidate just hours before. And while only 2 other NHL teams have been able to come back from a 3-0 deficit to win a series, Rangers Captain Jaromir Jagr still hasn't given up:

"I have a very funny feeling about this series. It's not over. It's just my feeling. I don't know how many believe me, but we'll see."

Coincidentally, the last NHL team to erase a 3-0 deficit was another NY team, the Islanders, against the Penguins. Nontheless, we'll see how Jagr's feeling after the Penguins put the final nail in their coffin Thursday night, in what Jagr is saying could be the last game of his career.

Edit: NY Rangers winger, Sean Avery, was hospitalized last night with a ruptured spleen. He was apparently hurt after taking a hit in the first period of last nights game and played the rest of the game with the ruptured spleen. Ain't that some shitty luck? Just as it looked like he might be able to get an early start on his summer internship at Vogue he has to go and get hurt. Seriously though, hope he's all right.

Now lets do it in New York

The Penguins are f**king scorching. After easily sweeping the Ottawa Senators in round 1, they're sitting on a 2-0 series lead against former Penguin great Jaromir Jagr and his NY Rangers. Offense, defense, they're doing it all.

Their second round series didn't start great though. In game 1 last Friday, things looked bleak. Just 4 minutes into the 2nd period and the Pens were trailing 3-0 and struggling to stay in the game. Jarkko Ruuto and Pascal Dupuis put the game within reach with goals just 14 seconds apart in the middle of the 2nd, and early in the 3rd, Marian Hossa and Petr Sykora added two more just 20 seconds apart to put the Pens up. The Rangers managed to tie it, but with the home crowd behind them, the Penguins added an Evgeni Malkin power play goal with just 1:41 left to seal the dramatic comeback victory and hand the Rangers their first road loss of the playoffs. It wouldn't be their last.

Game 2 was a far cry from the offensive fireworks of game 1 as the two goaltenders combined to stop 56 of 57 shots. Unfortunately for the Rangers, the single missed save came courtesy of Henrik Lundqvist when Evgeni Malkin shed Ranger defenseman Marc Staal and flipped a pass to Jordan Staal(Marc's brother) who made a great puck move and lifted it over Lundqvist. The single goal would be all that the Pens needed for the victory, but Adam Hall added an empty net goal at the end of the game anyway.

Tonight will be a big game for both teams as the Rangers try to get their momentum back behind the home crowd of Madison Square Garden while the Penguins look to take a commanding 3-0 series lead.

Steelers Draft Recap

I'll admit I was surprised at the direction the Steelers went in this draft. Despite obviously needing help on both lines, the Steelers used their first two picks on skill positions, taking Illinois RB Rashard Mendenhall in the first round and Texas WR Limas Sweed in the second. While I still think they should've done more to bolster their lines, they got great value with both players. Mendenhall was a projected top-15 pick, so when he fell into the Steelers lap at #23, he became a no-brainer. At 5'10" and 225 lbs, he'll add some power inside running to compliment Fast Willie Parker's outside speed. Mendenhall ain't no slouch in a footrace either though, putting up low 4.40's in the 40, mere hundreths of a second behind Parker's times. He can also block, and can catch as well, although Illinois didn't use him much to catch balls out of the backfield.

Limas Sweed was another great value pick. Easily one of the top 3 receivers in the draft and projected by most to go in the first round, he also fell to the Steelers who snagged him late in the 2nd round with the 53rd pick. Sweed will bring the size to the WR spot that Big Ben has been looking for. With the Steelers receiver production doing a nosedive once you get past Hines Ward and Santonio Holmes, he'll also provide some much needed depth at the position. He's not the fastest guy on the field, but at 6'4" and 212 lbs, he should be a nightmarish matchup for alot of cornerbacks. His senior season was cut short with a wrist injury that ended up needing surgery, but Coach Tomlin is confident that that isn't an issue. Ben is no doubt excited about this pick.

The 3rd and 4th rounds were more of what I was expecting from the Steelers, with UCLA DE Bruce Davis coming in the 3rd. Davis isn't big enough to play DE in the NFL, but shouldn't have a problem transition to outside linebacker in Dick LeBeau's 3-4 defense. The Steelers have successfully converted several other undersized DE's into great linebackers like former Pro Bowlers Joey Porter and Greg Lloyd, and current backers Clark Haggans and James Harrison. Davis has good speed and is 2nd in UCLA history with 29 sacks. He should be able to immediately contribute on special teams and provide some depth at linebacker.

In the 4th round, director of football operations Kevin Colbert finally got Ben some protection up front with Texas OT Tony Hills. With only one OT signed after next season, drafting at least one offensive linemen was a necessity, and Hills coaches think he is better than his former teammate Jonathan Scott, who is now playing in Detroit. Hill has been hampered by numerous injuries in his young career and likely won't be a contributor for at least a year or two.

The 5th round pick came as quite the surprise as the Steelers took Oregon QB Dennis Dixon, despite already having a solid backup to Big Ben in Charlie Batch. They may be thinking that Chaz Batch won't be sticking around much longer, or they might look to groom Dixon into a slash-type WR similar to the way they used Antwaan Randle El. He's still rehabbing the ACL he destroyed last fall, but is extremely athletic and a good value for a 5th rounder. On the downside, he wasn't good enough to start over Kellen Clemens at Oregon.

In the 6th and 7th round, the Steelers got some more defensive guys with inside linebacker Mike Humpal out of Iowa and free safety Ryan Mundy out of West Virginia. Both these guys will probably only make the team as special teamers, but could also see some time on defense as the Steelers aren't very deep at ILB and had some obvious problems at safety(I'm looking at you Anthony "Guarantee" Smith).

I don't pretend to have any sort of talent at judging which college players will become great NFL players, but overall I'm satisfied with the draft. I would have liked to see some more linemen taken, but like Coach Tomlin said, “There are two schools of thought to protect a quarterback, You can get linemen, or you can get him weapons.”

2008 NFL Mock Draft

Everybody else has got a mock draft. I wouldn't want my 2 readers to feel left out.

Miami: LSU - the entire team. Send all the current Dolphins down to the SEC(they should be able to manage a 3rd or 4th place finish).
St Louis: Erika Jensen - The Rams won Super Bowl XXXIV with a former grocery store clerk, and Kurt Warner didn't even win a grocery bagging trophy.
Atlanta: Ingrid Newkirk - She can probably throw as well as Michael Vick, and she's nicer to dogs
Oakland: Amy Winehouse - She won't even have to dress up to fit in with the Raider Nation
Kansas City: Chris Long, Virginia - The Chiefs go after another bad ass DE. With Long on one side and Jarred Allen on the other, the Chiefs pass rush will be unstoppable. Shit!
New York Jets: no pick - The Mangenius is tired of getting booed every year for his draft pick. Not this year.
New England: George W. Bush - If you get caught illegally spying, the best course of action is to just make it legal. Problem solved.
Baltimore: Erik Olsen - If anybody can get this geriatric defense back to the Super Bowl, it's the President of the AARP
Cincinnati: Dr. Phil McGraw - Marvin Lewis turned down the two first round draft picks that the Redskins offered him for a player he doesn't expect to play this year(Chad Johnson). For what? Just to teach him a lesson? Somebody needs to sit these two down and straighten some shit out.
New Orleans: Kenny Phillips, University of Miami - The Saints aren't going to take a chance on another weak hurricane season and are bringing in their own (Miami) Hurricanes to give them something to play for.
Buffalo: Van Chancellor, LSU - The Bills are the only team to make 4 straight Super Bowls and lose them all. Van Chancellor and the LSU Lady Tigers have one-upped them by making 5 straight NCAA Womens Final Four appearances without making the Championship game. It's a match made in heaven.
Denver: Neil Flynn, Scrubs - Apparently nobody in Denver knows how to pick up the trash. Time to bring in a professional.
Carolina: More lesbian cheerleaders with violent tendencies - Seriously, that was awesome and really the only thing I remember about the Panthers over the last 5 years.
Chicago: Jack Daniels - Can Jack Daniels do for Kyle Orton what Gatorade did for Michael Jordan?
Detroit: DeSean Jackson, California - Matt Millen is positive they're one star receiver away from winning a Super Bowl
Arizona: Tedy Bruschi - If you're looking for a championship, bring in an aging brute who's past his prime. Just ask the Suns.
Minnesota: Tiger Woods - Have you seen Tiger's boat? No more paying to rent boats for your bye week sex parties.
Houston: Luigi - The Texans took a chance and took Mario Williams instead of Reggie Bush in the 2006 Draft and it paid off. This year Texans owner Bob McNair gets confused and goes after who he thinks is Williams' brother.
Philadelphia: Calais Campbell, Miami - Donovan McNabb forces this trade after management is unable to convince him that Calais isn't actually related to the Campbell's Chunky Soup people.
Tampa Bay: Bruce Springsteen - The Boss had two hits with "Pink Cadillac" and "Cadillac Ranch". Does he have what it takes to get Cadillac Williams back to 2005 form?
Washington: Song Girls, USC - The Redskins are a perennial contender for hottest cheerleaders in the NFL, but you don't stay that way without going after the top up-and-coming talent.
Dallas: Michael Vick, Leavenworth Penitentiary - They already got Tank Johnson, they got Pacman Jones. If they can get Chris Henry from Tennesse they'll get a bulk discount on lawyer fees
Pittsburgh: Jaleel White - Maybe he can loan Santonio Holmes and Jeff Reed some suspenders to keep their pants on. Seriously guys, pants on.
Tennessee: Colt Brennan, Hawai'i - Sure they already have Vince Young, but coming from Hawai'i, Colt can probably get some kick-ass weed. And if you got him on the payroll, he's less likely to snitch to the cops.
Seattle: The Sonics - The only way the Seahawks are gonna get a championship banner to hang in the stadium any time soon
Jacksonville: Marcus Howard - The Georgia DE was the MVP of the Sugar Bowl. And when life hands you (Cleo) Lemon, you're gonna need some sugar to make lemonade.
San Diego: Barry Bonds - He's currently unemployed so you can probably get him cheap, and as Shawne Merriman has shown, the Chargers don't have a problem with steroid use.
Dallas: pick traded to Tennessee for Chris Henry - cause Jerry Jones is fucking crazy. Tennessee takes Jarious Jackson from the CFL's BC Lions. Another QB they don't need, but now they've got the Tennessee ganja market cornered between Colt Brennan's Maui Wowee and Jackson's BC Bud. If they can ever find somebody from Humboldt State they won't even need to sell tickets to make money.
San Francisco: Some gay guy - Not that there's anything wrong with that. Do you have any idea how hard it is to come up with 32 different jokes for one post?
Green Bay: Shane Stant - The Packers need somebody to take out Aaron Rodgers so they can convince Favre to come back.
New York Giants: Tiki Barber - They won the Super Bowl without him, imagine how good they'd be with him.

On to Round 2

Flash back to a year ago and you'd see the Penguins season ending in Ottawa with a loss to the Senators, capping a 4 games to 1 loss in the first round of the playoffs. Skip ahead to the last game of the regular season this year and you'd see Pittsburgh taking the ice against Philadelphia. A win against the Flyers would give them the #1 seed in the Eastern Conference and a first round matchup against Boston. A loss and they'd fall to the #2 seed and rematch against Ottawa. So the Penguins did what anybody would do and benched their star Sidney Crosby. The move and ensuing loss led many people, including the Ottawa coach, to speculate that the Penguins lost on purpose to set up a chance for revenge against the Senators. Whether that was the game plan or not doesn't really matter. What does matter is the Penguins made the Senators look like the Mighty Ducks...before Gordon Bombay taught them the value of teamwork and the flying V. It didn't take long for the Senators to see what was in store for them as Gary Roberts put one in the net just 68 seconds into the game. Petr Sykora added another first period goal on route to a 4-0 route of the Senators, and the Penguins never looked back, and finished the 4 game sweep in the same building where their season ended last year.

Sidney Crosby overcame a scoreless first game to finish with a team-high 8 points on 2 goals and 6 assists, and Evgeni Malkin was right behind him with 2 goals and 5 assists. Sykora was the goal leader with 3 as the Penguins outshot the Senators 161-112. It wasn't just offense though, goaltender Marc-Andre Fleury set a team record by allowing just 5 goals in the series. His .955 save percentage helped quell any playoff doubts Penguins fans had about the young goalie. Solid penalty-killing(Ottawa converted just 1 of 11 power plays) kept the Senators from ever having a chance, as they were outscored 16-5 while leading a total of just 4:28 in the series

It was the Penguins first sweep of a playoff series in 16 years, and the 4 wins improved Coach Michel Therrien's career playoff record to 11-10. The sweep will give the Pens plenty of confidence going into their second round matchup(likely against either the Rangers or the Flyers), but will also give them a week to rest, which will be especially welcome for Gary Roberts who didn't play the last two games of the series after suffering a sore groin.

Rip City is Back!!

The Blazers lost their final game of the season last night, falling 100-91 to the Suns in Phoenix. Despite finishing with a loss, the season was, without a doubt, hugely successful. This is how they finished up their last home game on Tuesday night in a sold out Rose Garden:



When Greg Oden went down before the season, this team was written off, but instead they banded together behind Brandon Roy and still managed a .500 season despite untimely injuries to LaMarcus Aldridge, Brandon Roy, and James Jones. They nearly doubled their win total from two years ago(21 wins in 2005-06). Their 41 wins also showed a 9 game improvement from last year. Roy's leadership on this team earned him a spot on the 2008 All-Star team just a year after running away with the Rookie of the Year award. With Oden returning next year to join Aldridge and Roy, this team is set up to seriously contend for the title in the next couple years. Even in the dominate Western Conference, they will likely be one of the teams to beat next year. And unlike the Suns, Mavericks, and Spurs, the Blazers won't have to worry about aging stars for some time, as they were the 3rd youngest team in NBA History this year.

And if the players we already have weren't enough to get you excited, how bout the ones we don't have. Spanish phenom Rudy Fernandez should be joining the team after finishing off his contract with the Spanish national team. The Blazers also got a favorable ruling from the NBA concerning Darius Miles bum knee and were able to release him freeing up a ton of cap space and if they're able to unload Raef LaFrentz that will free up even more. Don't get me wrong, I've got nothing against Raef, but there's no way he's worth what he's being paid, especially when next year he's unlikely to be much more than a 3rd string center. That should give them the cap space to go after a premier point guard to run the offense for them. The contracts they've given out over the last couple years have led several people to speculate that the Blazers plan to go after Chris Paul when he becomes a free agent next year, and rumor has it they had several offers rebuked by the Toronto Raptors earlier this year in an attempt to bring in Jose Calderon. While we currently have 4 point guards on the roster, none of them have shown that they will be the multi-faceted point guard the Blazers are looking for. Steve Blake is solid on defense, but he's not great at pushing the ball up the court. Jarrett Jack is the best scorer, and Sergio Rodriguez is the best at running the pick-and-roll, but tends to turn the ball over alot. With those three getting most of the playing time, we didn't get to see much of what Von Wafer could do after we brought him in before the trade deadline in exchange for Taureen Green, but if one of these guys doesn't show that they can develop into a premier point guard in the offseason, expect the Blazers to go after a big name.

In the front court, things are looking even brighter. LaMarcus Aldridge turned it up a notch this year, especially in the second half of the season, and is turning into a dominant forward, and Oden and Joel Przybilla are going to be a fearsome 1-2 punch at center. Channing Frye is understandably excited after spending his first two seasons in the black hole of the Knicks organization, and has shown flashes of what he will become. Then there's Travis Outlaw who improved drastically this year and turned into one of the premier 6th men in the league this year, averaging 13 and 5 off the bench. James Jones is an absolutely deadly shooter(he was 6-7 from 3 pt range Tuesday, and finished the season 2nd in the NBA behind the arc), and is one of the most underrated players in the league, and the Blazers poor record while he was injured shows it. Martell Webster showed he can knock it down from long range as well.

Right now, the biggest problem for the Blazers that I see is their roster space. That should get straightened out in the next year as they figure out what direction they're going at point guard. Obviously Brandon Roy, Greg Oden, and LaMarcus Aldridge are unlikely to go anywhere. Outlaw and Jones are next on my list of people to keep, followed by Przybilla. I'd love to see Przybilla stick around, but depending on what happens next year with him and Oden, he may decide to go to another contender where he can start, and he'd definitely deserve it. Channing Frye and Martell Webster would be nice, but not critical to keep. At point guard, Blake is our best option right now, with Rodriguez probably having the brightest future. Von Wafer may stick around since he can also play shooting guard behind Roy. Anyway you look at it, the future is bright.

In tribute to our I-5 brethren up in Seattle, here's a tribute video someone put together, appropriately set to Johnny Cash's 'Hurt':

Thanks for nothing Goodell!

The 2008 NFL Schedule was released yesterday and to paraphrase Roethlisberger on ESPN yesterday, if this was the BCS, the Steelers definitely wouldn't be the preseason #1. Based on last years records, they have the hardest schedule in the NFL, with their opponents combining for a .598 winning percentage. They will face 8 of the 11 teams that made the playoffs last year(the Steelers were the 12th playoff team), including all 5 of the AFC Playoff teams and both Super Bowl teams. They have road games against Jacksonville, Washington, New England, and Tennessee. Their home schedule isn't much easier with games against the Giants, Colts, Chargers, and Cowboys. There is also going to be limited morning boozefests, as they have only have 5 early games. They do get 5 games in primetime though(2 Monday Night games, 2 Sunday Night games, and a Thursday night game). At first glance, I have to say matching their 2007 record of 10-6 would have to be considered an outstanding success.

New England on the other hand, has the easiest schedule with their opponents 2007 records coming in at a measly .387 winning percentage and facing only 3 2007 playoff teams. What the hell? Belichick must have pictures of Goodell's wife blowing a goat or something.

With this brutal schedule, and Clevelands improvement last year, there is already talk of the Browns taking over as the top dog in the AFC North. Kinda like how everyone predicted the Bengals were going to do last year. I wonder how that worked out? Mondesishouse.com gives us a rundown of the 2008 Browns hype.

Channing Frye's Blog

Last week in Bill Simmons links of the week, he had a link to Channing Frye's blog. For those that don't know, Frye is one of the newer Blazers that came over as part of the Zach Randolph exchange with the Knicks last year. He's been pretty solid this year, coming off the bench for LA and Przybilla, and getting some solid starts the last few games with Przybilla out. He's got some pretty funny stuff on there:

Talking about steroids and the report about the steroids bust involving a bunch hip-hop guys:

The whole “I can’t move my arms, I’m so big” look. Maybe the ‘roids help them with their music or their sport. Maybe that’s it. I could be confused — they might think that being that huge could get them girls. Guys: you’re rich ‘n famous already.

They wanted you any way you were.

And an excerpt from his review of the Alien vs Predator movie:

I went to see this movie because I really was like there is no way you can mess up this movie. Put the two aliens against the predators throw a few humans in there, let them die horribly, have a huge alien fight the best predator like cage match or something, give it a cool ending… simple. But no, really, the best analogy is like asking your mom or dad to make cereal and they mess it up - they give you a fork to eat it with and then they pour lemon juice in it to drink it

Monday recap

I spent all weekend getting my white ass burnt to a crisp at the Portland International Raceway watching crazy ass fools whipping around at upwards of 170 mph on motorcycles. Pretty amazing how fast those guys jump back to their feet after biting pavement. I was pretty sure I watched one guy die. Anyway, here's another lazy ass updates post.

• The Seattle Sonics won what is probably their last game in Seattle. Thanks to the underhanded dealings of owner(and David Stern's good friend personal dicksucker) Clay Bennett, Seattle's 41 years of NBA history will likely be moving to the NBA mecca of Oklahoma City.
• Despite only one sub-par final round among the top 10 finishers(and none in the top 7), Tiger still couldn't make much of a threat on Sunday and finished 2nd behind South African Trevor Immelman
• Immelman, who had only one previous PGA Tour win, had surgery to remove a benign tumor last December, and had missed the cut in 4 of his last 8 starts.
• The Blazers got their 40th win Saturday night over the playoff-bound Mavericks. Its their 1st 40-win season since 2004. With a home game against Memphis on Tuesday before traveling to Phoenix for the season finale on Wednesday, the Blazers have an excellent opportunity to finish with at least a .500 record.
• NHL Playoffs: Montreal leads Boston 2-1; Pittsburgh leads Ottawa 2-0; Washington tied with Philly 1-1; NY Rangers lead New Jersey 2-1; Detroit leads Nashville 2-0; Calgary leads San Jose 2-1; Minnesota tied with Colorado 1-1; Dallas leads Anaheim 2-0
• In baseball action, the Diamondbacks have the top record at 9-3, while the Tigers are bringing up the rear at 2-10. The Pirates bounced back from getting swept by the Cubs(including 2 losses in extra innings) to sweep the Reds, and are sitting at 6-6.
• After a clever Boston fan/construction worker buried a David Ortiz jersey in the concrete while working on the new Yankees stadium. The Yankees foiled the attempted curse, by digging it back up. No sign of Hoffa's body.
  

Yeah, but can she pick up a weak-side blitz?

jacked from Mondesishouse

All Sports Updates

• Pat Summit won her 8th National Championship as coach of Tennessee as Candace Parker led the Volunteers to an easy victory over the drunken christmas trees of Stanford
• The NHL Playoffs start tonight with four games. The Pens are out for revenge in a rematch of last years opening round series against Ottawa. This time they're the favorites.
• Speaking of the Senators, A Canadian sportswriter is urging them to go after Sidney's ankle. Pittsburgh enforcer Georges Laraque replies: "That writer is just stupid. I've never heard anything so stupid." I'm betting Laraque and Jarkko Ruutu pick up some early penalty minutes so the Senators don't get any ideas.
• Another Lakers win streak ends at the Rose Garden. The Lakers have lost their last 6 and 12 of the last 14 at the Rose Garden. Roy, Aldridge, and Frye all picked up double-doubles and all had more than 20 points.
• The Masters Par 3 tournament will be aired on ESPN today. The real golf starts tomorrow.
• The Pirates are showing periodic flashes of mediocrity. I wouldn't go so far as to say they're improving, but maybe they finally worked out a 3 year plan to figure out that 5 year plan. Hey, at least they're not the Detroit Tigers.
• Steely McBeam got McDrunk which is cool, but then he also McDrove, McRanaRedLight, and got McArrested

How to lose money

You see? That's why I'm not a very good gambler. If you read everything I wrote yesterday except for my picks at the end, you would have thought I was picking Kansas and probably the under. I had all the information I needed, and I ignored it and went with Memphis instead. Look at some of the points I made in yesterday's post:

• Kansas has a size advantage
• Kansas has more depth
• Memphis starters played alot of minutes on Saturday
• Kansas was able to spread the minutes around
• Memphis has free throw shooting problems

And yet somehow I still talked myself into Memphis AND giving up points. In the end, it was their old nemesis the free throw that cost them the game. Sure they were making a ton of them in the last couple games, but those were with comfortable leads. They did pretty good last night too until the pressure mounted and they had to make them. Even then, Memphis had the win and the spread covered until that son-of-a-bitch Chalmers dropped in a prayer from behind the arc to tie it with just seconds remaining. And the over...well, I wasn't even close on that one. Even with an overtime they couldn't get past the 147 mark. I know hindsight is 20/20, but after huge emotional wins like Kansas and Memphis saw on Saturday and 2 1/2 weeks of high tempo basketball, I should've seen the under coming. In fact, I think a little research is due to see what percentage of title games hit the under. There might be a pattern there that we can use in the future.

Memphis vs Kansas

I should have known better than picking two teams whose best players were blue-chip white boys over two of the most athletic and talented college teams we've seen in recent years. Memphis and Kansas both took care of business rather easily against UCLA and UNC to set up what should be a very exciting and well-fought title match. I've been giving Memphis alot of shit during the tournament, mostly for their free-throw shooting, but other than a near miss against Mississippi State when they shot under 47%, it hasn't been a factor. They've gone from a season average of under 60% to a tourney average of over 70%. That average jumps to over 80% for the last three games against UCLA, Texas, and Michigan State. Derrick Rose and Chris Douglas-Roberts have been impressive and Joey Dorsey has been an absolute beast on defense, and by keeping Kevin Love in check was a huge factor against UCLA.

Kansas has also been doing an exceptional job of proving the doubters(myself included) wrong. Despite doing their best to give up a 28 point 1st half lead, the Jayhawks were able to outlast the Tarheels and pulled away after the North Carolina managed to close the gap to 4. Like Memphis, Kansas has been getting it done mostly with stellar guard play from Brandon Rush and Mario Chalmers. They've also got a big man inside in Sasha Kaun, who is nearly singlehandedly responsible for Kansas escaping Davidson in the Elite 8.

In the end, this should be a great match-up. Kansas has a slight size advantage, and has more depth off the bench than Memphis. That depth could be even more of a factor after Saturday's games. Memphis guards Rose, Douglas-Roberts, and Antonio Anderson all played more than 35 minutes against UCLA, while Kansas had 8 guys play double-digit minutes. Both teams suffered a near-loss against underdog opponents, but other than those games have been winning by healthy margins. I like the way Memphis bounced back after their game against Mississippi State by beating two tough teams in Michigan State and Texas. Kansas had to only get through UNLV and Villanova before nearly falling to Davidson. They looked to be bouncing back nicely in the first half against UNC, before struggling and nearly letting the game slip away in the second half. They won't be able to slack off like that against a motivated and athletic Memphis team.

Over/under 147: Take the over. Both these teams have multiple scoring options and this should be a fairly high scoring affair.

Memphis -2 over Kansas: Always bet on blue. Shit, never mind, they're both wearing blue. Even with Saturday's exhausting game against UCLA, I think the Tigers are too dialed in right now. Try and get the Kansas big boys in foul trouble and then make sure and keep hitting those free throws.

Jay Jensen's lips are safe

Jay Jensen is an athletic trainer for the Blazers. When training camp opened up last October, he heard Joel Przybilla bragging about how he was in the best shape of his career. Jensen laughed when Przybilla started telling everyone that he would play in all 82 games this year. Jensen had a point, Przybilla has missed a ton of games over due to injury, and in his 7 years in the NBA, has yet to play 82 games in a season. But this was a new and improved Joel Przybilla. With the drafting of Greg Oden, there were some question marks as to what Przybilla's role on the team would be, and he stepped up his offseason workouts. One thing led to another, and soon a wager was in place. If Joel failed to play in all 82 games, he had to buy dinner for Jay. But the other side of the bet is where things get entertaining. If Joel stayed healthy and didn't miss a game, Jensen would have to kiss Przybilla's ass at halfcourt at the conclusion of the Blazer's final game.

With just 6 games left going into Sunday's game against the Spurs, and Przybilla still healthy, Jensen had to have been getting worried. Luckily for him though, Przybilla will be forced to miss the final 5 games after breaking his hand in the Spurs game when his hand was smacked into the rim while attempting to block a shot in the 2nd quarter.

Final Four Picks

North Carolina over Kansas
UCLA over Memphis

I could write a bunch of bullshit and give you a bunch of reasons but really there isn't much exciting to talk about that hasn't already been beaten to death over the last few weeks. In a season in which all four #1 seeds made it to the final four, I don't see any reason to go against the favorites in these two games either. Besides who doesn't want to see two of the best white big men in college go head to head in what could potentially decide the Naismith College Player of the Year. If this was last year it wouldn't even be a contest and the upper-classman Tyler Hansbrough would get the nod. But with Kevin Durant popping the freshman player of the year cherry last year, Kevin Love's chances got infinitely better and if he leads the Bruins to a national title, he would have to get some serious consideration, especially if for some reason UNC falls to Kansas tomorrow.

Division Champs!

Despite numerous injuries to key players that threatened to derail their season, the Penguins clinched the Atlantic Division last night with a 4-2 win over the Flyers. Crosby and Fleury are getting back in the groove just in time for the playoffs after they both missed alot of time this spring. Crosby had 2 goals and an assist last night and Fleury did his part on the other end of the net stopping 27 shots as the Penguins won their 8th home game in a row while also clinching their first Division title in 10 years.

Evgeni Malkin added another goal and assist and was named team MVP after the game. Malkin has also made a serious case for himself as a Hart Trophy candidate. Although he has fallen behind Alexander Ovechkin in the scoring race, you can't overlook the way Malkin stepped up during Crosby's absence, especially when you consider that without Crosby, defenders were focusing alot more on Malkin. Plus, the Ovechkin-led Capitals have some work to do just to make the playoffs, while the Penguins can do no worse than the 2nd seed in the East. A win in their last game(against the Flyers again on Sunday) would guarantee the Pens at least a share of the top spot in the East(After going to wins, I have no idea how the NHL tiebreakers work, so we'll have to wait and see), while a Montreal loss would clinch the first seed for them.

Baseball is here!

The Pirates are undefeated!! No April Fools Day joke here, Xavier Nady hit his second homer of the game, a 3-run shot, in the bottom of the 12th and the Pirates hung on for an opening day win against the Braves. It wasn't pretty though. Pittsburgh choked up a 5 run lead in the bottom of the ninth and nearly lost their 3 run lead in the bottom of the 12th. Offense(or more appropriately, bad defense) was the name of the game as the two bullpens combined to allow 17 runs. At the plate, most of the Buccos started the season off on the right foot with a team batting average of .347 for the game, including Nady's 4-for-7. Not getting involved was Jason Bay, who continued his lackluster play from last year by failing to get a hit in 6 plate appearances. But don't worry, Bay was just as good on defense, as he let a 2-out pop fly fall to the grass in the ninth, letting the Braves score two runs and tie the game.

New manager John Russell got a win in his first game as a big league manager, and will try to improve to 2-0 as the Pirates stay in Atlanta to take on the Braves again Wednesday and Thursday. As of now, it will be impossible for the Pirates to fall below .500 until at least Thursday, a full 4 days into the season. Things are really looking up in the Steel City.

One's all advance

For the first time in history, we have all four #1 seeds in the Final Four. My picks from Thursday did much better, and I even managed to get back in the black after last weekends second round gambling mishaps. I did miss on the South region and after overestimating Michigan State's chances against Memphis, Texas just didn't have the depth on the bench to hang with the much more athletic Tigers. And the Tigers surprisingly good free throw shooting didn't help. I don't know if it was part of Texas' gameplan to try and force Memphis to beat them from the charity stripe(and based on Memphis' usual free throw shooting, I expect it probably was), but the Tigers stepped up to the challenge and shot over 83% from the line while attempting 27 more free throws. Even if the Longhorns were in hack mode the entire game, 36-9 still seems like an inordinately large difference in foul shot attempts.

Davidson's cinderella run finally expired as Kansas barely managed to hold them off despite another amazing game from Stephen Curry, who became just the fourth player in history to average over 30 points a game in the tournament. Davidson had a chance to win it at the end, but despite only being down by two, the Wildcats decided to try and force a 3 that wasn't there instead of sending Curry into the middle for a two or a chance to draw a foul. Although with Davidson shooting free throws like Memphis(5 of 12 in the game), a foul may not have worked out much better. The loss broke Davidsons 25 game win streak and sent the Jayhawks into the Final Four to face former Kansas coach Roy Williams and North Carolina.

Riding on to San Antonio

Seeing as how my stellar bracket picks from last week have about as much relevance to the actual Sweet 16 as WMD's had with the war in Iraq, here's picks for the teams that are actually playing.

Thursday Games

#3 Xavier over #7 WVU: Last weekend WVU had the advantage of being able to wear down a tired Duke team in the second half. They won't be able to do that with a rested Xavier team that is one of the best defensive teams in the nation, if not the whole country.

#1 UNC over #4 WSU: Washington State is playing great ball right now and have got to be riding high after their win over the Leprechauns in the second round, but UNC is too much for them.

#1 UCLA over #12 Western Kentucky: 3 times in the past couple weeks UCLA has needed a horrible call to win a close game. There was the phantom foul call against Stanford, the no-call followed by the illegal game-winning shot against California, and another no-call against Texas A&M last weekend. Sooner or later their luck will run out and they will be on the wrong side of a bad call. Fortunately for the Bruins, this game won't be close enough for it to matter.

#3 Louisvillle over #2 Tennessee: Tennessee had a legitimate argument for a #1 seed, and instead got screwed with a #2 seed in the hardest bracket of the year. Put them in the Midwest or the South region and they're probably a lock for the Final 4. Louisville started the year slow due to some key injuries, but are playing hot right now. They'll have to slow down a potent Tennessee offense to get a win tonight.

Friday Games

#10 Davidson over #3 Wisconsin: Going out on a bit of limb here, but I'm a sucker for Cinderella stories. This should be a low scoring affair, but if Curry and Jason Richards can get through the stingy Badger defense they'll have a good shot at winning this game. Wisconsin has won both their tourney games easily though whereas Davidson has had to win two tight ones. If they keep this one close I think they have the advantage. Getting through Kansas for a Final Four berth will probably be a different story.

#2 Texas over #3 Stanford: This should be a great game to watch as DJ Augustin and AJ Abrams from Texas take on the Lopez twins from Stanford. When in doubt, pick the team with lower educational standards.

#1 Kansas over #12 Villanova: Villanova has had a great run, and Kansas is in a dead heat with Memphis in the race to see which #1 seed falls first. I've got my cinderella in Davidson, and I'm sticking with it.

#5 Michigan State over #1 Memphis: Memphis' free throw shooting nearly cost them the game against Mississippi St. If Neitzel shows up for the Spartans like he did against Pitt last weekend, Memphis will be in trouble.

Regional Finals

#1 UCLA over #3 Xavier: Anything less than their third straight trip to the Final Four will be a huge disappointment for UCLA, and even with the karma they've got going against them from the bad calls, I've got to give the advantage to Kevin Love and Darren Collison

#1 UNC over #3 Louisville: I don't really see any team still alive in the East or Midwest that can keep UNC out of the Championship game.

#1 Kansas over #10 Davidson: I really hope this matchup happens. If Davidson gets past Wisconsin they're going to be riding with as much confidence as anybody. Unless you're a KU student or grad, theres no way you won't be rooting for Davidson. Can they pull out a George Mason and ride the wave into the Final Four. I wish I could say yes.

#2 Texas over #5 Michigan State: Texas will be working with damn near a home crowd as they won't have to travel outside the state of Texas for the rest of the tourney. Texas also goes a little deeper and I don't know how far Neitzel can carry the Michigan State team.

Damn you Neitzel!

From Wednesday's post...

#4 Pittsburgh over #2 Georgetown - It's a rematch of the Big East championship game with the same results. Pittsburgh takes home their first ever national title. If Georgetown can't get past UNC, UNC beats Pittsburgh though.

Well that worked out well. By the end of Saturday, my bracket wasn't good for anything except wiping my ass.

From 16 to 1

EAST Regionals

#1 UNC over #5 Notre Dame - Luck of the Irish runs out here
#3 Louisville over #7 Butler - I almost picked Butler here, but I gotta give some credit to Pitino

MIDWEST Regionals

#1 Kansas over #12 Villanova - Nice run 'Nova, but you're not super yet(shit, that was cheesy and geeky)
#2 Georgetown over #11 Kansas State - Shit Beasley, if you'd gone to a serious contender you'd be damn near a lock for Player of the Year and the #1 pick in the draft.

SOUTH Regionals

#4 Pittsburgh over #1 Memphis - And the first #1 seed is out! Memphis loses by 4 after going 12-29 from the free throw line.
#2 Texas over #6 Marquette

WEST Regionals

#1 UCLA over #5 Drake - D'oh! Bulldogs Fall to Collison
#3 Xavier over #2 Duke - You've gotta question the wisdom of this one

Great Eight

#1 UNC over #3 Louisville - Honestly if you're not picking UNC for a trip to the finals I don't know what to say
#2 Georgetown over #1 Kansas - Georgetown gets their second straight trip to the Final Four
#4 Pittsburgh over #2 Texas - Now that Pitt is healthy, they are a genuine threat to take home a title
#1 UCLA over #3 Xavier - And we've got two #1 seeds in the Final Four

Final Four

#2 Georgetown over #1 UNC - I don't know what to say
#4 Pittsburgh over #1 UCLA - I'm channeling my inner Bobby Knight. If they lose I'll just throw a chair across the room and choke somebody.

Championship

#4 Pittsburgh over #2 Georgetown - It's a rematch of the Big East championship game with the same results. Pittsburgh takes home their first ever national title. If Georgetown can't get past UNC, UNC beats Pittsburgh though.

Second Round Picks

EAST

#1 UNC over #9 Arkansas
#5 Notre Dame over #13 Winthrop - No cinderella here
#3 Louisville over #11 St Josephs - No glass slipper here either
#7 Butler over #2 Tennessee - I give Tennessee plenty of support drinking Jack Daniels. Time to show Butler a little love.

MIDWEST

#1 Kansas over #8 UNLV
#12 Villanova over #4 Vanderbilt - Hmmm, can the Wildcats make it till midnight?
#11 Kansas St over #3 Wisconsin - Uh-oh, Villanova has competition for the midwest cinderella crown
#2 Georgetown over #10 Davidson - This is pretty experienced Georgetown that didn't lose much from their 2007 Final Four run

SOUTH

#1 Memphis over #8 Mississippi St - I don't think Memphis has what it takes for a serious title run, but they get past the Bulldogs without much trouble
#4 Pittsburgh over #12 Temple - Another cinderella wannabe turns out to be an ugly stepsister
#6 Marquette over #3 Stanford - If they're the Cardinals, why is Stanfords mascot a Christmas tree that looks like it won 3rd prize in a kindergarten grade arts and crafts contest
#2 Texas over #10 St Mary's - If Durant had stuck around for another year, this Texas team would be headed for title town

WEST

#1 UCLA over #9 Texas A&M
#5 Drake over #4 UConn - Drake Beats Fairies from Connecticut
#3 Xavier over #11 Baylor - You hear that Baylor? Thats the clock striking midnight. Maybe next year
#2 Duke over #10 Arizona - Duke haters will have to wait at least another week

March Madness starts tomorrow

Holy shit the games start tomorrow. Where the hell did the rest of the week go? Between work, St Paddy's day, and other things going on, I didn't even fill out a bracket until this morning. In addition, other than a few conference tourney's I've watched very little basketball in the last several weeks and managed to squeeze in maybe a grand total of an hour of March Madness preview shows on ESPN this week. Since I don't have much time today to do serious research, I'm going with the gut-feeling method of filling out a bracket. Because of this, I'm not going to list any gambling picks for the first two rounds this weekend. I can't stress enough the importance of not taking these picks seriously. Unfortunately, my complete lack of effort on this also almost guarantees this will be the best bracket of my life.

EAST

#1 UNC over #16 Mt St Mary
#9 Arkansas over #8 Indiana
#5 Notre Dame over #12 Winthrop - Notre Dame is actually one of the few teams I've watched this year, and they've been flying under the radar
#13 Winthrop over #4 Washington State - Woohoo, our first big upset of the week
#11 St Joseph's over #6 Oklahoma - Sorry, no Fiesta Bowl rematch here
#3 Louisville over #14 Boise State - Despite what I said Monday, these Cardinals will totally kick the shit of these Broncos
#7 Butler over #10 South Alabama - South Alabama? So are they from the Gulf of Mexico?
#2 Tennessee over #15 American - If you pick American to lose the terrorists win, but if you pick them to win you hose your bracket. Nobody said this was gonna be easy

MIDWEST

#1 Kansas over #16 Portland St
#8 UNLV over #9 Kent State - Always bet on Vegas
#12 Villanova over #5 Clemson - Clemson played tough in the ACC tourney, but I still say they're a 9 or 10 seed at best
#4 Vanderbilt over #13 Siena - Isn't Siena a crayola color? update: Burnt Sienna is a crayola color. They still lose
#11 Kansas St over #6 USC - USC has a solid team, but whose gonna stop Beasley? And Mayo ain't going shot for shot with Beasley
#3 Wisconsin over #14 CS Fullerton
#10 Davidson over #7 Gonzaga
#2 Georgetown over #15 UMBC

SOUTH

#1 Memphis over #16 UT-Arlington
#8 Mississippi St over #9 Oregon - I'm still not sure why I picked this one
#12 Temple over #5 Michigan St - When in doubt, pick against the Big 10
#4 Pittsburgh over #12 Oral Roberts - Cause nobody wants oral from a dude named Roberts
#6 Marquette over #11 Kentucky
#3 Stanford over #14 Cornell - It's the battle of the eggheads! Stanford by the square root of 158!
#10 St Mary's over #7 Miami
#2 Texas over #15 Austin Peay

WEST

#1 UCLA over #16 Mississippi Valley
#9 Texas A&M over #8 BYU - If God was a mormon, Mitt Romney would've beat McCain. BYU heads home early for Easter.
#5 Drake over #12 Western Kentucky - Drake Balls For Championships
#4 UConn over #12 San Diego
#11 Baylor over #6 Purdue
#3 Xavier over #14 Georgia - I hadn't heard a peep about Xavier until the selection show. Where the hell did they come from?
#10 Arizona over #7 West Virginia - Arizona SOS is #2 and they played in the Pac-10. I gotta give them some love
#2 Duke over #15 Belmont - Duke may have gotten a gift with the #2 seed, but they still take Belmont easily

From the Weekend

What you missed while passed out in green-infused drunken haze

• Nate McMillan got his 300th career victory as the Blazers beat the Timberwolves 107-96. Big props Coach!
• Denver had 8 players score in the double digits and Marcus Camby had a triple double in less than 27 minutes of play as the Nuggets beat the Oklahoma Sonics 168-116
• The Rockets continued their improbable win streak, beating the Lakers by 12. The Rockets have now won 22 straight games, including 10 straight since they lost Yao Ming for the year.
• Tiger Woods is dialed in tight. After two rounds of play at the Arnold Palmer Invitational, Tiger trailed by 7 strokes and his streak of 6 straight tournament victories seemed at risk. But Tiger battled back and by the time he got to the 72nd and final hole, he was tied for the lead and he was standing 25 feet away from the hole with a downhill, breaking putt that would either win it or send him to a playoff. Even though he hadn't made a putt over 20 feet all weekend, I think we all would have been more surprised if he had missed it. Tiger has 9 wins and a 2nd place finish in his last 10 tournaments, and is now tied with Ben Hogan for third place on the all-time wins list.
• The NCAA tournament field is set. Memphis, UCLA, Kansas, and North Carolina all received #1 seeds. Coppin State became the first team to ever make the tournament after losing 20 games, and will face off with Mount St Mary's Tuesday for the right to lose to North Carolina.

I'll be back later this week with some March Madness picks. You should ignore them and make your picks based on the mascots and uniforms. It's a proven method. If you can't beat Veronica in accounts payable, join her. Don't worry about what your friends will think. If they ask why you picked Boise State over Louisville, you don't have to tell them it was because you thought a Bronco would kick the shit out of a Cardinal, just spout some shit about Boise State's 50% shooting from the field and higher assist/turnover ratio.

I'm kind of a big deal

I have many leather-bound books and my apartment smells of rich mahogany. Oh yeah, and I'm also officially a Portland Trailblazers season ticket holder. That's right, next year me and one lucky guest(it could be you!) will be sitting in section 317, row L, seats 1 and 2.



That's right, I got aisle seats. That means I won't even have to step over any fat guys when I get up to get another beer.

Hossa Update

Good news. It sounds like Hossa's injury has been downgraded to just a sprained MCL. He will still miss at least a week, but he'll still have almost a month and plenty of games to get used to his new team before the Pens start their playoff run.

Buyers Remorse

Fuck. I hope the Penguins kept their receipt from the Marian Hossa trade. After giving up Erik Christensen, Colby Armstrong(a first round pick in 2001), Angelo Esposito(a first round pick in last years draft), and their first round pick in this years draft to acquire Hossa from Atlanta, The Penguins got a total of 10'12" of ice time out of Hossa before he left in the 2nd period with a knee injury. ESPN is reporting that he has a partially torn MCL. The critics who complained that GM Ray Shero gave up too much to get Hossa kinda have a point now.

Steelers/Blazers/Penguins Update

RIP Myron Cope: 1929-2008. The former Steelers radio announcer died early this morning at 79. Cope's 35 years in the broadcast booth was best known for his catch phrases and the creation of the famous Terrible Towel and was inducted into the National Radio Hall of Fame in 2005. Cope was such a beloved Pittsburgh icon, that when he retired in 2004 the Steelers didn't even attempt to replace his unique voice and style and instead downsized the 3-man announcers booth to just 2 people.



In 1975, Cope created the Terrible Towel by urging fans to bring yellow dish towels to the game to wave in support of the Steelers as they took on the Baltimore Colts. Not long after the Steelers began selling the golden towels with the words "Myron Cope's Terrible Towel" emblazoned on them. Since then, the sale of Terrible Towels has raised millions of dollars for charity.

Blazers

The bad news continues with the Blazers who have fallen to 29-28 by losing 9 of 12 in February and 8 of their last 9. The biggest culprit seems to be shooting, or lack thereof, as displayed by last nights 96-83 loss to the Lakers. Even without Brandon Roy(sprained ankle), the Blazers started out hot, and led by as much as 15 in the first quarter and were up by 7 at the half. But they came out cold in the second half, shooting barely 25% in the second half(36% overall). Even with the poor shooting, the Blazers were able to hang in the game by playing inspired defense and were only down 1 after 3, but in the last 5 or 6 minutes, the Lakers pulled away.

Brandon Roy will also miss tonights games against the Clippers, but my return Friday when they take on the Lakers again, this time in the Rose Garden. James Jones should also return Friday after missing several weeks with a sore knee. Jones' strong shooting(2nd in the NBA from 3 pt range) will be a welcome addition. During the Blazers outstanding December and January, Jones could always be counted on to make big shots to get the Blazers back on track when they hit a shooting slump. If they want any chance at all of making the playoffs, they're going to have to play lights out ball for the next month and a half as they are currently 5.5 games out of the final playoff spot in the West.

Penguins

Finally some good news. The Penguins have been continuing to play great puck(how come you never hear that term? If football and basketball players can play ball, I say hockey players play puck. While we're on the subject, instead of balling, hockey players puck. It's our job to make this mainstream). Despite playing without Sidney Crosby for the last several weeks, the Pens are just one point out of the lead in the Atlantic Division and the Eastern Conference. They geared up for a run at the Stanley Cup yesterday by acquiring Marian Hossa from the Thrashers yesterday before the trade deadline. The move signified to the league that the Penguins aren't looking to win a Cup sometime in the next few years, but are going balls out for it this year. They had to give up alot to get Hossa, as they sent the Thrashers Colby Armstrong, Erik Christensen, last years 1st round pick Angelo Esposito, and a 2008 1st round pick. The fact that Hossa becomes a free agent in July makes the move even gutsier as they will probably have to have a strong playoff showing if the want to convince Hossa to resign.

Hossa will add another scoring threat to already formidable Pittsburgh offense, which in Crosby's absence has been led by another young phenom Evgeni Malkin who has used Crosby's absence to show the league what he can do and with a goal and an assist in last nights 4-2 win over the Islanders, now leads the league in scoring.

Unlike last year, this years defense is also strong. Ty Conklin has used Marc-Andre Fleury's injury to his advantage as well and been playing outstanding defense. He has gone 17-4-5 in Fleury's absence and is going to make it tough for Fleury to get his starting job back if he keeps playing like he did in last nights win when he had 50 saves.

Let Levi Ride!!!

You don't have to read my entire rant here, but at least jump to the last paragraph for the link to sign the petition.

Here we go again. The fucking French are tired of getting their asses kicked every year by foreigners in the Tour de France. Usually this just means that they do everything they can to implicate as many foreigners, and especially that years winner, in doping scandals with their bullshit lab work and defamatory press coverage by French newspaper Le Monde. They failed time and time again with these tactics against Lance Armstrong, and the only reason they've shut up about him is because he threatened to keep coming back and kicking all their girly French asses if they didn't shut the hell up. They managed to succeed against Floyd Landis and stripped him of his title, despite the fact that the World Anti-Doping Agency (WADA) admitted that the French doping lab fucked up and had no way to determine whether Landis' positive tests were legit or even if they were his samples for that matter.

This year they're taking it a step farther. Last year was perhaps one of the most doping-tainted Tours ever with 3 riders(including pre-race favorite Alexandre Vinokourov, and Michael Rasmussen, who was the overall leader when he was booted by his own team after missing drug tests) and two entire teams dropping out because of doping. It was eventually won by the young Spanish phenom Alberto Contador with his teammate and American legend Levi Leipheimer finishing third and on the podium for the first time in his career. They tried to nail Contador after the tour because his name came up in another doping investigation(a teammate mentioned him once in passing in one phone call), but a judge cleared him immediately. Leipheimer has never been anywhere close to a doping scandal and was once more poised to take a run at the title. The French know that Levi is as clean as they get, so what do they do? The Amaury Sports Organization (ASO) decides to ban his entire team(Team Astana, which he has just joined) from competing in this years Tour(or any of the other premier races owned by ASO). They claim it's because Team Astana had some troubles with doping last year. OK, so "some troubles" might be letting them off the hook, the entire team had to drop out after leader Vinokourov tested positive, but that was before Levi or Contador was on the team. In fact almost all the riders are different from last year, as well as completely new management. Team Astana has also adopted some of the most rigorous anti-doping controls of any cycling team, and spends more on anti-doping than any other pro tour team. The only thing about the team that has stayed the same is their name. It seems pretty obvious that this is nothing more than a transparent childish ploy to keep some of the best riders out of the competition. How can they honestly believe that banning two of last years top three finishers will be anything but bad for the sport. The Tour is by far the most famous of all cycling competitions and is the holy grail for any cyclist because the best of the best compete against each other. If you take the best out of the race, it's just a bunch of dipshits in spandex riding through the mountains. And how would you like to be the guy that wins the Tour without challenging those racers? Wouldn't that be a bit like a normal person winning a gold medal in the Special Olympics?

I know cycling has always been a much bigger deal over in Europe than in the US, but without the relatively recent influx of American interest thanks mostly to Lance Armstrong, there is more money and interest in the Tour de France than ever before, and now they're willing to sacrifice all that out of fear of another American whooping up on their toad eating asses. So heres the deal, check out Levi's website, http://letleviride.com and sign the petition. In fact sign it with every email address you have and spread the word to anyone else who might sign it. Will it do any good? Maybe, maybe not, but it can't hurt.

Clemens Testifies

Roger Clemens and Brian McNamee testified in front of congress this morning regarding Clemens alleged steroid use. I honestly don't give a shit about any of it, but it was on every got-dam channel this morning so I heard some of the testimony. This quote during Clemens opening statements struck me:

"If I'm guilty of anything, it's caring too much. It's being too nice

I don't know if Clemens used steroids or HGH, but at the very least they can get him for perjury now. Clemens has been accused of alot of things, but being too nice certainly isn't on that list. This is a man who said of Hank Aaron, "I wish he were still playing, I'd probably crack his head open to show him how valuable I was." Classy. picked up part of Mike Piazza's broken bat during the World Series and hurled it him as he was running to first base. Clemens claimed he had "mistaken" the bat for the ball and was just trying to throw Piazza out. Thats the best excuse you could come up with? That you thought a long cylindrical piece of wood was actually a small, leatherbound ball?

Pro Bowl recap

Hey how about that, there was a football game yesterday. Every year we get cock-teased by the Pro Bowl before being banished from pro football for 6 months. This year the NFC won 42-30 in a spectacular comeback win over the AFC. I watched exactly one play. I used to get excited about the Pro Bowl because, hey, it is football. And it's the last NFL game until August, so it's gotta be better than whatever else is on television right? Wrong. It sucks. Every got-dam year. This year though, I hit them with a pre-emptive strike and fell asleep on the couch before the game. I woke up sometime in the 3rd quarter to take a leak and got to watch Derek Anderson throw an incomplete pass before falling back asleep.

Weller kicks some ass

I gotta post this hockey action from last night. Craig Weller of the Phoenix Coyotes is a fucking bad ass. Watch him drop 3 guys in under 5 seconds.

I'm taking a break

So it wasn't dream. It actually happened. We saw Eli fricking Manning outplay Tom Brady and Tom freaking Coughlin outcoach Bill Belichick IN THE SAME FRICKIN GAME!! And it was in the Super Bowl against the un-freakin-beatable New England Patriots!! If I was the 1972 Dolphins, I would send invites to your annual "still undefeated" party to Manning, Tyree, Burress, Umenyiora, Strahan, and Tuck. Oh yeah, don't forget Brady, Belichick, and Rodney Harrison. Check out the Reebok perfectville commercial for another take.

One other thing I forgot to mention yesterday. What the hell was Jeremy Shockey doing up in a luxury box during the game? I understand you're hurt and can't play, but shouldn't you at least be down on the sidelines cheering? I guess if my coach gave me an option I'd be up in the box with the chicks and booze too, but I don't think this helps Shockey's image as a bad teammate.

Even with everything that happened in that game, there is one play that still has me shaking my head in disbelief:



Wow. Not bad for a guy that only caught 4 passes all year. This will go down as the greatest catch in Super Bowl history. You have no idea how painful that is for me to say either, since it takes that distinction away from Steeler great Lynn Swann and his catch(es) in Super Bowl X against the Cowboys. I couldn't find video of just the catch, but it's at about the 6'40" mark in this one:



Wow. If that doesn't tell you why Swann got the MVP that game, check out his sideline catch at the 4 minute mark in this one. Or the game-winning catch(4'10")

Anyway, now that football is over, I'm taking a little break from regular posts. I'll still throw up the occasional updates on the Blazers/NBA and the Penguins, and I'll start getting some NCAA action in there too, but for your daily dose of ridiculous shit, you're gonna have to go elsewhere. I'd recommend Kissing Suzy Kolber, Deadspin, and With Leather. Also don't forget about the boys over at Buster Wants to Fish for a little change of pace.

New recommended site

I just came across the Pro Football Talk site. I'm not sure how good it is cause I haven't read much of their stuff yet, but they've got a "Days without an Arrest" counter(on the right side). That alone is worth checking out once a week or so. It's currently at 4 days(way to go NFL!). I wonder what the record is.

Super Bowl Commercials

Overall not a great year for commercials. They've just gotten too hyped and companies are trying too hard. Instead of new creative shit, everyone just goes with the old overdone stuff that we see every year because they're afraid to take any risks. Those are fine for regular commercials, but in the Super Bowl, I want to see some creativity. Talking/dancing animals? getting a little boring(vicious breast-feeding badgers are still funny though). Getting hit in the nuts? OK, so that's still funny, especially when its Justin Timberlake. Carlos Mencia? Never was funny.

Budweiser Rocky Spoof

I like this one, but they should've also used the scene where Rocky climbed a 30,000 foot mountain in the Rocky IV training montage.

Audi Godfather spoof

Another pretty solid movie spoof. The only problem now is that next year we're gonna see 18 shitty attempts to copy the classic movie spoof

Doritos mouse trap

I think this was my favorite. I kept waiting for the guy to end up getting his hand caught in the trap going for the chip, but then BAM! a giant mouse comes through the wall and kicks his ass. Good stuff.

Pepsi with Justin Timberlake

See? celebrity nut violence is always funny

And while we're on the subject of commercials, very few will ever compare to the Office Linebacker commercials from a few years back. Here's an extended version:

And 1

As in 18 wins...And 1 loss. It's a shame that the basketball company already owns the rights to the 'And 1' phrase, or I would totally copyright that shit and make a truckload of money selling t-shirts and bumper stickers and those kick-ass combination keychain/flashlight/bottle-opener's. The Patriots went from being potentially the greatest team in NFL history, to being the answer to a trivia question. They are the first team to ever rack up 18 wins in a season WITHOUT winning the Super Bowl. They could've literally lost 8 regular season games and made the playoffs. They are the team that lost to Eli Manning in his first Super Bowl. That's right, THAT Eli Manning. In just his 4th year in the league, a guy that has been known more for throwing picks in big games and collapsing every December engineered a 4th quarter comeback with less than 3 minutes left to beat Tom Brady and the unbeatable New England Patriots. Eli became the second of the first three quarterbacks taken in the 2004 NFL Draft to win a Super Bowl(our boy Big Ben was the first, Philip "Douchebag" Rivers is still waiting for his ring).

Manning played nearly mistake-free football(even his one INT was more of a fumble by Steve Smith than an INT. The pass was perfect) and looked calm and confident in the pocket and on the sideline. Meanwhile Brady, looking like he was up til 6 am partying with his bloodshot eyes and red face, was getting his ass handed to him by the unstoppable pass rush of Justin Tuck, Osi Umenyiora, and Michael Strahan, and spent most of his time off the field sulking on the bench with his head down. If you didn't know who was who and tried to identify the quarterbacks on the sideline by reputation alone, you would never have guessed that that was the guy who had just won 18 straight games, was dating a Victoria's Secret model and had a baby with a Hollywood actress. You never would've guessed that the guy on the other sideline was the pouty, less-talented baby Manning, who has been routinely criticized for his lack of leadership.

I never thought I'd see the day when I was giving Eli Manning kudos for being the Super Bowl MVP, but there you go. But as good as Eli played, especially in the 4th quarter, lets give credit where credit is due. The MVP belonged to the defense, most notably the 3 defensive ends. Without that defense, Eli could've had 5 4th quarter TD's and they still would've lost by 14 points. Even while rushing 5 or less most of the time, the Giants sacked Tom Brady 5 times. The Patriots offensive line had only allowed 21 sacks ALL YEAR. Justin Tuck had two sacks, 5 tackles, and a forced fumble. Osi Umenyiora had 3 tackles and a fumble recovery. Michael Strahan added 2 tackles and a sack. None of those number take into account the other 10 or 15 times that Brady got knocked down after throwing a pass. I wouldn't have had a problem with David Tyree getting it either. That 3rd down catch on the last drive was one of the most amazing catches I've ever seen. I am still in shock that that actually happened.

Perhaps the best part in my mind is that Bill Belichick lost this game. This is the man who is supposed to be one of the greatest football minds of all time. The word Genius is thrown at this guy without hesitation, yet in the third quarter he let his ego get in the way and it potentially cost him this game. I'm the last guy that will give a coach shit for going for it on 4th down, but that was a flatout horrible call. 4th and 13 from the 31 and you go for it? A field goal gives you a touchdown lead. You can't tell me a 48 yarder is out of Stephen Gostkowski's range. That was just Belichick being too cocky. He was the coach for the undefeated New England Patriots, playing against Eli Manning and the New York Giants. He thought he was unbeatable and was going to prove it once and for all. Unfortunately, he didn't prove it, and when the dust settled, those three points he passed up ended up being the margin of victory for the Giants. One game sent you from being tied with former Steeler coach Chuck Knoll as the only coach to win 4 Super Bowls(serves him right, Belichick doesn't deserve to be mentioned in the same sentence as Knoll). You went from being one of only 3 other teams with 4 Super Bowl rings(49ers, Cowboys, and the Steelers) to still being on the kiddie table list of teams with 3 wins. Which, by the way, thanks to their win on Sunday, now also includes the New York Giants.

So how'd I do on the betting side of the game? The Giants win put me at 8-3 overall picking the playoff games. The prop bets ended up paying out nicely as well:

Giants +12 over Patriots - W: Ha Ha...Suck it Boston
Combined total over 54 points - L: Wow, not even close on this one
Coin Toss Tails - W: I told you tails never fails
Giants win coin toss - W: hells yeah, things are looking up
No on all the pregame pundits picking Patriots to win - W: This was a close one, but Frank Caliendo, the one guy who wasn't an ex-football player or coach knew what was up
National Anthem takes under 1'42" - L: So technically I lost this one, but you wanna hear the best part? I accidentally hit the wrong button and bet the over. I was fucking pissed off, and while I'm watching Jordan Sparks sing it, I'm getting a little more confident everytime she holds a high note an extra beat. It was still way too close to comfort, but then she took like 20 seconds alone on "land of the free, and the home of the brave" to hit the over on this one. Sometimes it's better to be lucky than good.
Joe Buck mentions Peyton Manning over 5.5 - L: I don't think he mentioned his name once during the game, but there were plenty of camera shots of him. Looking back I bet the wrong way on this one. I should've known they wouldn't talk much about Peyton because they wouldn't want to take the spotlight of little brother Eli. Live and learn I guess.
Tom Petty opens with "I won't back down" or "running down a dream" - L: American Girl? Fuck you Tom, these two teams have been battling for 5 months to get here and you honor them with some sappy-ass song like American fucking Girl?
Tom Petty lights up a joint during halftime - L: OK, no surprise here, but at 100/1 odds, it was worth a shot. Can you imagine if you actually won money on Tom Petty lighting up a joint during the Super Bowl? I would be telling that story to everybody I met for the rest of my life.
MVP thanks coach first - L: Technically this bet hasn't settled yet, and I couldn't hear Eli's speech, but I think it was teammates. And rightfully so, the defense won that game.
Giants score first - W: Nicely done Eli
Giants score last - W: Not the way I expected it to play out, but a wins a win
First score is a FG or Safety - W: So pretty much the first 10 minutes of this game went as perfectly as possible for my bets. Giants pick tails and win, go down the field and score a FG. I was 4-0 just like that.
Total FG's over 3.5 - L: The overall lack of scoring cost me here
Patriots don't convert a 4th down - W: If you had told me that Belichick would attempt 2 conversions I probably wouldn't have made this bet, but it worked out.
Manning doesn't throw an INT - L: Steve Smith owes me money on this one. That ball hit him in the hands and he just handed it to Ellis Hobbs
Amani Toomer - total receiving yards is an odd number - L: I blame the refs on this one, they gave a horrible ball spot on one of his catches in the 4th quarter
Wes Welker total receptions over 7.5 - W: easy win here, Welker tied an NFL record with 11 catches
Lonest reception either Plaxico Burress or Jabar Gaffney - L: Kevin Boss got the award for this one.
Patriots have the most turnovers - Push: Steve Smith dropping that pass into Hobbs hands cost me again. DAMN YOU STEVE SMITH!!

So there you have it, 9-10-1 on the picks(10-9-1 on the actual bets though thanks to that Jordan Sparks fuckuplucky mistake) for the week. For the playoffs overall I finished dead on .500 with a 14-14-1 overall.

Super Bowl Betting Extravaganza

Super Bowl weekend. The last weekend of football until next fall(unless you count the Pro-Bowl, but I don't). I'm sure you've heard all the analysis you can stand by now...Patriots are gonna win in a blowout, Patriots are gonna win but the Giants will keep it close, Giants have a chance for an upset. Then there's the QB talk, Eli Manning has finally arrived, is Brady hurt or not, oh look, someone proposed to Brady, blah, blah, blah. We've had two weeks of this shit, lets get to the good stuff.

The Super Bowl is one weekend where you don't have to know shit about football to lose money gambling. Hell you don't even have to care about football, you can bet on just about anything you want. Yeah you can bet on the game itself(I'm taking the Giants +12 over the Patriots*), if you think the Giants can win it outright, you can lay a bet at +375** for them to win. You can bet on the combined final score(I'm saying over 54). But you can do that for any game. You can also bet on plenty of stats-based bets, but those are boring(mine are listed below). This is the only weekend you can bet on the crazy stuff though. Why wait until the end of the game, lets bet on the coinflip. I've got a foolproof system...Tails never Fails(-105). It rhymes, how can it lose? And you know what, I'm taking the Giants to win the coin toss(-105). But why even wait until the game starts? Do you think the entire Fox pregame crew will pick the Patriots to win? I say no(somebody's going out on a limb and taking the underdog), so I'm betting they don't(+130). What about you American Idol fans that tuned into Fox to see the commercials. Guess what? Idol Alumn Jordin Sparks is singing the National Anthem. How long do you think it takes her? I say it's less than 1 minute 42 seconds and I'm putting my money where my mouth is(-115). I know you're thinking that's a stupid bet, but you've got to look deeper. Jordin is still young and not real famous yet, so she's gonna be a bit nervous. You always rush speaking and singing things when you're nervous. If she was a more established prima donna, you'd want to take the over. Not only would she be more comfortable with the crowd, but she'd probably throw a little personal flair into it like a extended high notes and other shit that would eat up extra seconds.

What about during the game? How many times do you think the camera shows Archie Manning? Vegas has the over/under set at 6.5, but I'm not betting this one. I think Peyton being at the game will take some of the spotlight off of Archie, but they may be sitting close enough together that they're both in the shots. Too many variables for me. But I do think that there is gonna be plenty of talk about Peyton Manning, so I'm taking the over(line at 5.5) on Peyton mentions by game announcer Joe Buck(-125).

No on to the halftime show. If I were Tom Petty, what song would I open with. It's gotta be either "I Won't Back Down" or "Runnin' Down a Dream." I'm going with "I Won't Back Down"(+500). Actually fuck it, I'm also laying a wager on "Runnin' Down a Dream"(+400). The beauty of this one is that they're both paying better than +200 so as long as it's one of those two, I come out on top. I'm also laying down a very small wager saying that Petty lights up a joint during the halftime show(+10,000). Surprisingly, thats also the same odds that you'd get betting that Britney Spears streaks during the game. How are those the same odds? Don't you think that there's a much better chance of Petty smoking a doobie? Wait, what the hell am I saying. If Britney wasn't in the middle of an extended "vacation" at her local psych ward I'd totally lay money on that. She's in what Bill Simmons calls the "Tyson Zone" in which nothing she could do would surprise you. As far as I'm concerned there are 3 lifetime members to the Tyson Zone. Mike Tyson(of course, it's his Zone), Tom Cruise, and the latest member is our very own Britney Spears.

The big one is always who will the MVP thank first. There are the obvious choices: God(+250), family(+200), and teammates(+200). The odds say the Patriots are gonna win, which means the obvious choice for MVP is Tom Brady. I don't see him as a big God man, and he's not married so I think family is out. You could go with the underdog and say he thanks no one(+600), but that's a long shot. Teammates is probably the safe bet, but at only 2/1 odds, it's not a good value. Given everything thats happened to the Patriots this year and the way they all stood by Belichick during the Spygate scandal, I'm betting on coach getting thanked first(+500).

Here are my other bets:

Giants score first(+140): Since I'm betting they win the toss, I say they go down and kick a field goal right off the bat
Giants score last(+135): Probably playing from behind, so they'll score and then Patriots run out the clock
1st score will be a FG or Safety(+160): Going with the value bet here
Total FGs by both teams - over 3.5(+150): The Patriots D is good for at least 2 stops in the redzone, so we only need 2 more from either team
Patriots don't convert a 4th down(+135): I don't think this will be a close enough game where Brady has to convert a 4th down late to stay in the game. Beware if they win the toss though, Belichick wouldn't be afraid to go for it on 4th to get the first score.
Manning doesn't throw an INT(+180): He hasn't thrown one yet in the postseason, so I'm taking the value bet here
Amani Toomer - Total receiving yards is an odd number(-105): Why not, I say 47 yards
Wes Welker total receptions - over 7.5(+125): He won't have many yards, but he'll have 8 or 9 quick catches when Moss is getting double teamed
Longest single reception in the game: We're gonna do another double bet. Plaxico Burress(+400) and Jabar Gaffney(+700)
Team with most turnovers - Patriots(+240): Again, sometimes you gotta take a chance on the value bets.

So there you have it. The No Doubt About It, Can't Lose, Way Kick Ass Copperhouse Retirement Plan.

One more side note. If the Patriots lose, you can blame the Boston Globe for jinxing them by pre-selling "19-0: The Historic Championship Season of New England's Unbeatable Patriots". I can't believe I can't bet on how long it takes some Boston masshole to burn down the Boston Globe offices if the Patriots lose. That's just un-American.

*Note: 5 out of 5 doctors recommend NOT following this advice. If you value your money at all, you should seriously consider NOT betting on the advice of an anonymous internet blogger.
**If the odds are listed as a positive number like +375, that means for every $100 you wagered you'd stand to win $375, plus you'd get your original $100 bet back. If it's a negative number like -105, then you'd have to risk $105 to win $100 plus your original $105 back. Of course you can also bet in much smaller increments, like $10.5 to win $10 or something.