The Sports Guy's on Tilt

Bill Simmons has fucking lost it. He's pulling out all the stops in an attempt to beat his wife at picking the NFL games. She smoked him last year and he chalked it up to a fluke. So he brings her back knowing deep in his heart that she can't beat him again, and guess what? She's beating him again. It's only Week 4 and he's panicking and doing crazy stuff like guaranteeing a 9-5 week while doing nothing but picking the home teams(except for his beloved Patriots and taking the Broncos with points against the Colts). He's been talking all year about how good Seattle is in the NFC and then won't even pick them as a measly 2 point favorite. He fell into the classic "The Cardinals are good on paper, they've got to be good on the field" trap and picked them to not only cover against Pittsburgh, but beat them by a touchdown. He's betting against Brett Favre and on the Browns. The Browns? I've been talking as much as anybody about how the Ravens aren't the team everybody thinks they are, but they can beat the damn Browns by 5 points. He's even sticking with his sunken sleeper pick Atlanta over the team he's one win away from switching his sleeper pick to. When the Falcons lose to the Texans on Sunday, you can bet on a "Texans are my new sleeper" article from Simmons next week. He's already down by 4 games to his wife, and he's lucky she's only picking 3 games different this week. For the record, he's still one game up on me, so really I have no room to talk. But I will anyway, because that's the beauty of the internet. I won't be held accountable for anything I say.