I somehow managed to forget two games when I made my picks this morning. Since I know everybody is especially excited against the Jets/Dolphins game, here they are:
Jets +1 over DOLPHINS: The Jets have only won two games this year: One against a the Dolphins in week 3, and one against the Ste...well it doesn't matter who they won their other game against. This will be the Dolphins biggest test of the season in their attempt to go 0-16, but I think they can do it without Ricky Williams, who made it all of 6 plays before going out for the season with a torn titty muscle.
Bucs +3.5 over SAINTS: Who knows which Drew Brees will show up. If its the one that lost to the Rams the Bucs will walk all over the Saints. If the Jaguar killing Brees shows up though, the Bucs could be in trouble.
Friday, November 30, 2007
Evel Knievel: Dead at 69
He survived almost 40 broken bones, an attempt to jump the Snake River Canyon on a rocket-powered motorcycle, and a liver transplant, but Evel Knievel finally died today. I haven't seen a cause of death yet, but he had been in rough shape for the last several years due to his affliction with diabetes and pulmonary fibrosis.
Knievel was born and raised in Butte, Montana, the home of the original Copperhouse. Each year thousands flocked to Butte each year for the annual Evel Knievel Days celebration, which I can personally say is one crazy kick-ass good time of a party.
American Gladiators is Back!!
Man I can't wait for the new American Gladiators. Hosted by Hulk Hogan and Laila Ali? How can this go wrong?
We got off to a sizzling 0-1 start to the week as the Packers failed to cover the seven point spread last night. I wish I could blame it on Brett Favre getting hurt in the 2nd quarter, but Aaron Rodgers actually played alot better in the 2nd half than Favre did in the 1st. Yesterday I talked up Favre's new found aversion to risk and Favre paid us back with 2 classic "chuck and duck" interceptions in the first half that helped the Cowboys build an early lead that they never relinquished. Green Bay was also without cornerback Charles Woodson which limited their ability to keep T.O. under wraps, and he burned them good with 156 yards and a TD. The Packers pulled within 3 in the 4th quarter, but saw their hopes for a comeback dashed by a questionable pass interference call that gave the Cowboys the ball on the 5 yard line and led to another Tony Romo to Patrick Crayton hookup.
REDSKINS -6 over Bills: The loss of Sean Taylor could go either way for the Redskins, but I think they're able to use it as inspiration. At least this week.
VIKINGS -3.5 over Lions: Last week the Giants defense somehow managed to make Tavaris Jackson look like a good QB. He's not, but it doesn't matter in this one.
TITANS -4 over Texans: The Titans have lost 3 straight. Last week they couldn't even score a touchdown against the Bengals defense. This might not be the best pick.
Jaguars +7 over COLTS: Even at home, I just can't pick the Colts here. I want to, but I just don't see them winning by more than a field goal here.
Chargers -6 over CHIEFS: Herm Edwards blew last weeks game against the Raiders, and probably killed whatever confidence the Chiefs had. Which wasn't much without Priest Holmes or Larry Johnson
Broncos -3.5 over RAIDERS: The Donkey's lucked out when they beat the Raiders in Denver, this one won't be as close.
Giants +1.5 over BEARS: How the fuck am I supposed to pick between Fetus Head Manning and Sexy Rexy. I'm putting the over/under on turnovers at 11 on this one...and I'm probably taking the over.
STEELERS -7 over Bengals: Back at Heinz Field this week for the Sunday Night game. It will be interesting to see what condition the field is after Monday's debacle.
Pats -20.5 over RAVENS: Favored by 21 points on the road?!?! OK, I'll take them.
Season: 78-89-11
Money Picks*
We won both our straight up bets, but missed on the teaser again. Fuck the teaser.
RAMS -3 over Falcons: Last week the Rams were a goalline fumble away from beating the Seahawks for their third straight win. I think they can handle the Dirty Birds
Browns pick over CARDINALS: Whisenhunt is 2-1 against teams from his old stomping grounds of the AFC North, but this Browns team isn't like any of the ones he saw when he was in Pittsburgh
EAGLES -3 over Seahawks: I hate picking against the Seahawks, but they never do well traveling to the east coast. Especially when they have to play the early game.
PANTHERS -2.5 over 49ers: I'm going with the Panthers on this one for the same reason as the Seahawks game. West coast team playing the early game on the east coast.
Season: 20-25
* Note: 5 out of 5 doctors recommend NOT following this advice. If you value your money at all, you should seriously consider NOT betting on the advice of an anonymous internet blogger.
We got off to a sizzling 0-1 start to the week as the Packers failed to cover the seven point spread last night. I wish I could blame it on Brett Favre getting hurt in the 2nd quarter, but Aaron Rodgers actually played alot better in the 2nd half than Favre did in the 1st. Yesterday I talked up Favre's new found aversion to risk and Favre paid us back with 2 classic "chuck and duck" interceptions in the first half that helped the Cowboys build an early lead that they never relinquished. Green Bay was also without cornerback Charles Woodson which limited their ability to keep T.O. under wraps, and he burned them good with 156 yards and a TD. The Packers pulled within 3 in the 4th quarter, but saw their hopes for a comeback dashed by a questionable pass interference call that gave the Cowboys the ball on the 5 yard line and led to another Tony Romo to Patrick Crayton hookup.
REDSKINS -6 over Bills: The loss of Sean Taylor could go either way for the Redskins, but I think they're able to use it as inspiration. At least this week.
VIKINGS -3.5 over Lions: Last week the Giants defense somehow managed to make Tavaris Jackson look like a good QB. He's not, but it doesn't matter in this one.
TITANS -4 over Texans: The Titans have lost 3 straight. Last week they couldn't even score a touchdown against the Bengals defense. This might not be the best pick.
Jaguars +7 over COLTS: Even at home, I just can't pick the Colts here. I want to, but I just don't see them winning by more than a field goal here.
Chargers -6 over CHIEFS: Herm Edwards blew last weeks game against the Raiders, and probably killed whatever confidence the Chiefs had. Which wasn't much without Priest Holmes or Larry Johnson
Broncos -3.5 over RAIDERS: The Donkey's lucked out when they beat the Raiders in Denver, this one won't be as close.
Giants +1.5 over BEARS: How the fuck am I supposed to pick between Fetus Head Manning and Sexy Rexy. I'm putting the over/under on turnovers at 11 on this one...and I'm probably taking the over.
STEELERS -7 over Bengals: Back at Heinz Field this week for the Sunday Night game. It will be interesting to see what condition the field is after Monday's debacle.
Pats -20.5 over RAVENS: Favored by 21 points on the road?!?! OK, I'll take them.
Season: 78-89-11
Money Picks*
We won both our straight up bets, but missed on the teaser again. Fuck the teaser.
RAMS -3 over Falcons: Last week the Rams were a goalline fumble away from beating the Seahawks for their third straight win. I think they can handle the Dirty Birds
Browns pick over CARDINALS: Whisenhunt is 2-1 against teams from his old stomping grounds of the AFC North, but this Browns team isn't like any of the ones he saw when he was in Pittsburgh
EAGLES -3 over Seahawks: I hate picking against the Seahawks, but they never do well traveling to the east coast. Especially when they have to play the early game.
PANTHERS -2.5 over 49ers: I'm going with the Panthers on this one for the same reason as the Seahawks game. West coast team playing the early game on the east coast.
Season: 20-25
* Note: 5 out of 5 doctors recommend NOT following this advice. If you value your money at all, you should seriously consider NOT betting on the advice of an anonymous internet blogger.
Thursday, November 29, 2007
Blazers struggles come home
The Blazers win-at-home-lose-on-the-road trend seems to be reversing a bit. Unfortunately, so far it's only the win-at-home part that is changing as the Blazers lost to the Pacers last night 95-89. After starting the season 4-0 at home, the Blazers have now dropped 3 of their last 4 at home to drop to 5-10 overall. On the bright side, they're still in 3rd in the Northwest thanks to the horrendous play of the Kevin Garnett-less Timberwolves and a Sonics team that seems determined to waste Kevin Durants talents with bad coaching. The Blazers are going to get tested hard on the road for the next few games as they travel to San Antonio, Dallas, and Memphis. While the Blazers aren't winning as much as I thought they would, they are showing improvement at times in running McMillan's new uptempo offense. Once this young team gets used to the faster pace and gets more comfortable with each other in the transition game, they will start improving exponentially.
Tonight the Packers and Cowboys face off in what right now looks to be a preview of the NFC Championship game. Brett Favre has never won at Texas Stadium, but looks to change that tonight against Tony Romo(who is apparently bumpin uglies with Jessica Simpson again). This game looks to me like it will come down to whichever quarterback makes the fewest mistakes. In years past Favre could always be counted on to throw bad picks that often hurt him in big games, but is playing better this year than I think he ever has. Now that he's gotten a little older(ok, alot older) he can't rely on his pure talent and physical strength anymore and it has forced him to play a much cleaner, less risky game and it's been working to the tune of the Packers best record since the Lombardi days. A key matchup in this game will be Terrell Owens against the Packers physical corners. If they can keep TO in check, I think Favre gets his first win at Dallas and the Packers set themselves up for homefield advantage throughout the playoffs.
Packers +7 over COWBOYS
Unfortunately 95% of the country won't be able to watch it at home thanks to the ongoing dispute between the NFL Network and cable companies. Except for satellite customers and the cable viewers that ponied up the extra cash for the NFL Network on cable, most people will be forced to travel to a local drinking establishment to watch the game.
Tonight the Packers and Cowboys face off in what right now looks to be a preview of the NFC Championship game. Brett Favre has never won at Texas Stadium, but looks to change that tonight against Tony Romo(who is apparently bumpin uglies with Jessica Simpson again). This game looks to me like it will come down to whichever quarterback makes the fewest mistakes. In years past Favre could always be counted on to throw bad picks that often hurt him in big games, but is playing better this year than I think he ever has. Now that he's gotten a little older(ok, alot older) he can't rely on his pure talent and physical strength anymore and it has forced him to play a much cleaner, less risky game and it's been working to the tune of the Packers best record since the Lombardi days. A key matchup in this game will be Terrell Owens against the Packers physical corners. If they can keep TO in check, I think Favre gets his first win at Dallas and the Packers set themselves up for homefield advantage throughout the playoffs.
Packers +7 over COWBOYS
Unfortunately 95% of the country won't be able to watch it at home thanks to the ongoing dispute between the NFL Network and cable companies. Except for satellite customers and the cable viewers that ponied up the extra cash for the NFL Network on cable, most people will be forced to travel to a local drinking establishment to watch the game.
Tuesday, November 27, 2007
3-0
Nope, thats not a baseball score. Or even a hockey score(although 5 NHL teams scored at least 3 points last night. The Flyers scored 3 points...and lost), it's not even a soccer futball score. Thats a damn football score. After 4 Pennsylvania high school games on Friday and a Pitt Panthers game on Saturday, the turf at Heinz Field was in rough shape. There wasn't time to tear up the old turf, so the Heinz Field people decided to just lay fresh sod down on top. That might have worked, but then the rain started coming down...and kept coming and coming. The rain didn't stop even after all the yardage markers had been washed away. The rain kept coming as the stadium was cleared because of a lightning threat. It kept coming down as the Steelers and Dolphins finally took the field and waged a muddy, grind-out war that ended in the lowest scoring NFL game since the Jets beat the Redskins 3-0 in 1993. Until Jeff Reed's 24 yard field goal with 17 seconds left gave the Steelers the victory, it was the longest an NFL game had been scoreless since 1943 when the Lions and the Giants played to a 0-0 tie.
It was an ugly, muddy, mess of a game, played on an even worse field. Every step on the field resulted in cleats sinking inches into the muddy grass. Runners attempting to cut back fell down as their cleats tore through the soft turf and left huge divots in the field. The field that was so soft and muddy that punts were landing in the mud and sticking...no bounce, no roll, nothing. Every sportscaster in the last 12 hours has used the Tiger Woods wedge shot analogy, but it's the only analogy that works. It wasn't a pretty game by any standards, and in the end, it could've just as easily been the Dolphins who booted the winning field goal or it could've gone to overtime and ended in a 0-0 tie. But on a night when Big Ben set a Steelers team record for completion percentage, the Steelers made a couple extra plays when it counted and came away with the W. It's a whole lot better to win ugly than to lose ugly.
On a gambling note, we missed a golden opportunity. As soon as I saw the turf conditions, I should've been betting the hell out of the Dolphins plus the points and the under. Unfortunately I was in the truck listening on the radio and couldn't make it to a computer before the game started.
On a much sadder note, the Redskins safety Sean Taylor died last night from the injuries sustained when he was shot in his Miami home Sunday night. My deepest condolences go out to his friends and family and especially his girlfriend and their 1 year old daughter.
It was an ugly, muddy, mess of a game, played on an even worse field. Every step on the field resulted in cleats sinking inches into the muddy grass. Runners attempting to cut back fell down as their cleats tore through the soft turf and left huge divots in the field. The field that was so soft and muddy that punts were landing in the mud and sticking...no bounce, no roll, nothing. Every sportscaster in the last 12 hours has used the Tiger Woods wedge shot analogy, but it's the only analogy that works. It wasn't a pretty game by any standards, and in the end, it could've just as easily been the Dolphins who booted the winning field goal or it could've gone to overtime and ended in a 0-0 tie. But on a night when Big Ben set a Steelers team record for completion percentage, the Steelers made a couple extra plays when it counted and came away with the W. It's a whole lot better to win ugly than to lose ugly.
On a gambling note, we missed a golden opportunity. As soon as I saw the turf conditions, I should've been betting the hell out of the Dolphins plus the points and the under. Unfortunately I was in the truck listening on the radio and couldn't make it to a computer before the game started.
On a much sadder note, the Redskins safety Sean Taylor died last night from the injuries sustained when he was shot in his Miami home Sunday night. My deepest condolences go out to his friends and family and especially his girlfriend and their 1 year old daughter.
Monday, November 26, 2007
Sean Taylor not improving
Sean Taylor is in pretty rough shape. His former lawyer and family friend, Richard Sharpstein, has said that Taylor is "nonresponsive and unconcious." Doctors are also concerned about the immense loss of blood affecting blood flow to the brain.
Sharpstein has also said it was clearly an armed robbery, but the police still won't confirm or deny that claim. We're all hoping and praying that Taylor pulls through this.
Sharpstein has also said it was clearly an armed robbery, but the police still won't confirm or deny that claim. We're all hoping and praying that Taylor pulls through this.
Weekend Recap
Sean Taylor
Redskins safety Sean Taylor was shot in his Miami home last night. He is apparently in critical condition as the bullet pierced his femoral artery and he lost a ton of blood. Best wishes to Sean and his family. For as much shit as we give athletes for getting caught packing heat, there has been a disturbing trend of big name athletes being the victims of armed robberies in their own homes. In early September Texans cornerback Dunta Robinson was robbed at gunpoint in his home and two NBA players, Eddie Curry and Antoine Walker, were robbed in their homes at gunpoint this summer.
Devin Hester
When are they going to learn? You don't fucking kick to Devin Hester! You'd think it was part of an NFL coaches job description to watch the occasional game film, or at least tune into Sportscenter once in a while. But if they did that, you'd think we wouldn't see Hester taking punts and kicks to the house as much. Shanahan took the stupidity a step further; not only did he keep kicking down the middle of the field until Hester took a punt back for a touchdown, but he continued kicking to Hester, resulting in a kick return for a touchdown as well. The end result? Broncos lose in OT.
Patriots
Oh so close. The Patriots defense got an early pick six and then after taking the lead in the 4th, they stepped up again and sealed the victory with two more interceptions in the last 4 minutes of the game. The Eagles definitely exposed some weaknesses in the Patriots offense though as their constant blitzing kept Brady off balance and under pressure. This gives some hope for the week 14 matchup against the Steelers who will no doubt have some inventive LeBeau blitz schemes for Brady to try and escape.
Random thoughts from Sunday
BCS
Alot of shakeup in the rankings this weekend as #1 LSU lost in a triple OT thriller to unranked Arkansas and #2 Kansas dropped to #4 Missouri. The win earned Mizzou the top ranking in the BCS, and West Virginia was able to move up to #2 with a big win over #20 UConn. Is there anything scarier than being #2 in the BCS rankings this year? The way things are going, even Dave Wannstedt and Pittsburgh have got to look like scary matchup for #2 West Virginia going into this weekends Big East championship.
The BCS could get even more interesting this weekend as the top 2 teams both have to play conference championship games with Missouri also facing a tough matchup against #9 Oklahoma for the Big 12 championship. Meanwhile none of the next 3 top teams have any more games, so if either Mizzou or WVU lose this weekend, Ohio State(#3), Georgia(#4) and even Kansas(#5) all will be hoping for BCS Championship bid. Please God don't let a shitty, overrated Big 10 team like OSU sneak into another Championship game.
Redskins safety Sean Taylor was shot in his Miami home last night. He is apparently in critical condition as the bullet pierced his femoral artery and he lost a ton of blood. Best wishes to Sean and his family. For as much shit as we give athletes for getting caught packing heat, there has been a disturbing trend of big name athletes being the victims of armed robberies in their own homes. In early September Texans cornerback Dunta Robinson was robbed at gunpoint in his home and two NBA players, Eddie Curry and Antoine Walker, were robbed in their homes at gunpoint this summer.
Devin Hester
When are they going to learn? You don't fucking kick to Devin Hester! You'd think it was part of an NFL coaches job description to watch the occasional game film, or at least tune into Sportscenter once in a while. But if they did that, you'd think we wouldn't see Hester taking punts and kicks to the house as much. Shanahan took the stupidity a step further; not only did he keep kicking down the middle of the field until Hester took a punt back for a touchdown, but he continued kicking to Hester, resulting in a kick return for a touchdown as well. The end result? Broncos lose in OT.
Patriots
Oh so close. The Patriots defense got an early pick six and then after taking the lead in the 4th, they stepped up again and sealed the victory with two more interceptions in the last 4 minutes of the game. The Eagles definitely exposed some weaknesses in the Patriots offense though as their constant blitzing kept Brady off balance and under pressure. This gives some hope for the week 14 matchup against the Steelers who will no doubt have some inventive LeBeau blitz schemes for Brady to try and escape.
Random thoughts from Sunday
- If the Seahawks bothered to show up before halftime for their games they might be a pretty good team. Playing back from a two score halftime deficit every week can't be easy.
- I love Arizona. They're like clockwork. When you hear Chris Berman and his boys start talking Sunday morning about how the Cards are playing really well and starting to turn the corner and are gonna make a playoff run, etc, etc, bet against them, and bet against them hard.
- It's not always a great throw by the QB, sometimes receivers make amazing plays on really shitty throws. I'm tired of watching QB's force it into double coverage and have the receiver manage to come down with it only to hear Joe Buck tell me what an amazing throw that was the way the quarterback got it throught the coverage for the completion. Fuck you, give the little guy some credit.
- The Patriots kept the undefeated season alive. Tonight we get to see if the Steelers can keep the Dolphins out of the 'W' column.
BCS
Alot of shakeup in the rankings this weekend as #1 LSU lost in a triple OT thriller to unranked Arkansas and #2 Kansas dropped to #4 Missouri. The win earned Mizzou the top ranking in the BCS, and West Virginia was able to move up to #2 with a big win over #20 UConn. Is there anything scarier than being #2 in the BCS rankings this year? The way things are going, even Dave Wannstedt and Pittsburgh have got to look like scary matchup for #2 West Virginia going into this weekends Big East championship.
The BCS could get even more interesting this weekend as the top 2 teams both have to play conference championship games with Missouri also facing a tough matchup against #9 Oklahoma for the Big 12 championship. Meanwhile none of the next 3 top teams have any more games, so if either Mizzou or WVU lose this weekend, Ohio State(#3), Georgia(#4) and even Kansas(#5) all will be hoping for BCS Championship bid. Please God don't let a shitty, overrated Big 10 team like OSU sneak into another Championship game.
Wednesday, November 21, 2007
Patriots/Eagles Line Update
Apparently my comment that Vegas had abandoned the line on the Patriots/Eagles game was incorrect, but it is the largest point spread ever! That is, not counting expansion teams. The line opened at 17 and everybody and their dog jumped on the Patriots which pushed the line up to 22 points almost immediately. In Vegas, it is apparently now sitting at around 23.5. However, none of the online sportsbooks that I occasionally visit for educational and journalistic purposes are currently carrying a line. So even if I wanted to, I would be unable to bet on this game(of course I don't want to since I'm not in Vegas and that would make sports gambling illegal).
Happy Thanksgiving!
I managed to sneak out a 8-6-2 record last week, but I'm gonna have to do better than that if we want to get back above .500 for the year
COWBOYS -14 over Jets - The Jets go on the road this week, so New Yorkers won't have any Gate D titty flashing to distract them from the shilacking that Dallas is going to lay on them
Colts -12 over FALCONS - The Colts better get back on track quick. Luckily they're playing the Falcons and Joey Harrington.
Seahawks -3 over RAMS - The pressure's off the Rams. They won a game and no longer have to worry about going 0-16, which means they can go back to sucking
GIANTS -7 over Vikings - What the hell is going on? Peyton and the Colts are falling apart and Eli and the Giants are looking like a serious NFC contender.
BUCS -3 over Redskins - No idea here, so I'm taking the home team
Saints -3 over PANTHERS - I'm getting whiplash watching the Saints, can they just make up their mind on whether they're gonna win games or not?
Titans +1 over BENGALS - I don't know that I'd pick the Bengals as favorites if they were playing the Dolphins
BROWNS -3.5 over Texans - I'm pretty sure that ball bouncing backwards off the support beam last week violated at least 3 laws of physics.
Raiders +6 over CHIEFS - the meh, whatever game of the week
49ers +10.5 over CARDINALS - never mind, this one is even worse than the Raiders/Chiefs matchup
Broncos +2 over BEARS - 2 in a row for the Broncos, and they're smelling a possible AFC West title. Not that that is really anything to be proud of.
Ravens +10 over CHARGERS - 4 months ago these two teams were being talked about as Super Bowl contenders, now they're just trying to finish above .500.
PATRIOTS over Eagles - That's it, Vegas has given up on even keeping a line on Patriots games. Our cash cow has broke the fence and headed for the hills. If you can find a line on this game of less than 25 points, bet it.
STEELERS -16 over Dolphins - Steelers haven't lost a game at home this year. Dolphins haven't won a game period. Steelers have won 12 straight Monday night games at home. The Dolphins are looking to be the first 0-16 team ever.
Season: 68-82-11
Money Picks*
Packers -3 over LIONS - 3 points? I know this is a huge Thanksgiving Day rivalry and the Pack is on the road, but this almost seems to easy. And in Friday's news, Brett Favre shit the bed against the Lions to fall to 9-2.
JAGUARS -7.5 over Bills - The Jags matchup next week against Indy could end up deciding the division. Lets hope the Jags don't look past the Bills.
4-team teaser (NOTE: all lines have been teased by 6 points)
COWBOYS -8 over Jets
JAGS -1.5 over Bills
Titans +7 over BENGALS
Colts -6 over FALCONS
Season: 18-24
* Note: 5 out of 5 doctors recommend NOT following this advice. If you value your money at all, you should seriously consider NOT betting on the advice of an anonymous internet blogger.
COWBOYS -14 over Jets - The Jets go on the road this week, so New Yorkers won't have any Gate D titty flashing to distract them from the shilacking that Dallas is going to lay on them
Colts -12 over FALCONS - The Colts better get back on track quick. Luckily they're playing the Falcons and Joey Harrington.
Seahawks -3 over RAMS - The pressure's off the Rams. They won a game and no longer have to worry about going 0-16, which means they can go back to sucking
GIANTS -7 over Vikings - What the hell is going on? Peyton and the Colts are falling apart and Eli and the Giants are looking like a serious NFC contender.
BUCS -3 over Redskins - No idea here, so I'm taking the home team
Saints -3 over PANTHERS - I'm getting whiplash watching the Saints, can they just make up their mind on whether they're gonna win games or not?
Titans +1 over BENGALS - I don't know that I'd pick the Bengals as favorites if they were playing the Dolphins
BROWNS -3.5 over Texans - I'm pretty sure that ball bouncing backwards off the support beam last week violated at least 3 laws of physics.
Raiders +6 over CHIEFS - the meh, whatever game of the week
49ers +10.5 over CARDINALS - never mind, this one is even worse than the Raiders/Chiefs matchup
Broncos +2 over BEARS - 2 in a row for the Broncos, and they're smelling a possible AFC West title. Not that that is really anything to be proud of.
Ravens +10 over CHARGERS - 4 months ago these two teams were being talked about as Super Bowl contenders, now they're just trying to finish above .500.
PATRIOTS over Eagles - That's it, Vegas has given up on even keeping a line on Patriots games. Our cash cow has broke the fence and headed for the hills. If you can find a line on this game of less than 25 points, bet it.
STEELERS -16 over Dolphins - Steelers haven't lost a game at home this year. Dolphins haven't won a game period. Steelers have won 12 straight Monday night games at home. The Dolphins are looking to be the first 0-16 team ever.
Season: 68-82-11
Money Picks*
Packers -3 over LIONS - 3 points? I know this is a huge Thanksgiving Day rivalry and the Pack is on the road, but this almost seems to easy. And in Friday's news, Brett Favre shit the bed against the Lions to fall to 9-2.
JAGUARS -7.5 over Bills - The Jags matchup next week against Indy could end up deciding the division. Lets hope the Jags don't look past the Bills.
4-team teaser (NOTE: all lines have been teased by 6 points)
COWBOYS -8 over Jets
JAGS -1.5 over Bills
Titans +7 over BENGALS
Colts -6 over FALCONS
Season: 18-24
* Note: 5 out of 5 doctors recommend NOT following this advice. If you value your money at all, you should seriously consider NOT betting on the advice of an anonymous internet blogger.
Tuesday, November 20, 2007
Road Woes Part 2
Home: 4-0
Away: 0-7
Somethings gotta give. The Trail Blazers dropped their fourth straight, and seventh overall, on the road last night losing to Charlotte 101-92. Thankfully the Blazers return home with a 4 game stand in the Rose Garden starting Wednesday against the Nets. They will need to get some convincing wins to hault this slide and get some confidence back before this gets any farther out of hand.
Away: 0-7
Somethings gotta give. The Trail Blazers dropped their fourth straight, and seventh overall, on the road last night losing to Charlotte 101-92. Thankfully the Blazers return home with a 4 game stand in the Rose Garden starting Wednesday against the Nets. They will need to get some convincing wins to hault this slide and get some confidence back before this gets any farther out of hand.
Monday, November 19, 2007
Road Woes
Dear Steelers,
Seeing as how most of you decided not to show up yesterday in New York, I just wanted to let you guys know what happened. You just lost to the Jets. The same Jets that hadn't won a game against anybody but the Miami Dolphins this year. You once again shit the bed against the worst rush defenses in the league. Willie Parker, the NFL's second leading rusher just gained a mere 52 yards against the Jets. Big Ben had a serviceable day, other than those fumbles and the classic "force a pass into double coverage" interception that he manages to pull off about once a game. It couldn't have been easy on him though, what with the Jets up his ass the entire game. You just allowed seven sacks by the Jets. Yes this is the same New York Jets that was ranked 30th in overall defense and dead last against the run. Right now Joey Porter is sitting in South Beach salivating at the thought of the 17 sacks he's going to register next week when he returns to Pittsburgh for his first game against his old team.
Don't worry Defense, I didn't forget about you. You just gave up 150+ yards rushing to the Jets. Even worse, you just allowed Thomas Jones to rack up 117 yards against what was, a mere 24 hours ago, the leagues best defense. The first 100 yard game by a rusher since 2005. 35 games since a running back had put up 100 yards against the vaunted Steelers defense. Since then you've faced running backs the likes of LaDanian Tomlinson, Shaun Alexander, Larry Johnson, Edgerrin James, and numerous other talented running backs who weren't playing for the Jets. You just let Kellen fucking Clemens eat you alive on a 4th quarter game-tying drive. And the only reason it was a game-tying drive and not a game-winning drive is because Brad Smith had trouble with one of those pesky Clemens passes that bounced off his hands.
You don't lose to the Jets without a complete team effort though. Luckily, the special teams came through with breakdown just in time to hand the Jets the game. I was impressed with the way you handled kick coverages during the game, I almost thought maybe you'd learned your lesson after that debacle last week against the Browns. But then you decided to let the Jets return a punt into field goal territory in overtime. 3 short runs later and the Jets ended the misery with an easy 38 yard field goal.
I tell you what, I'm really excited to see what you guys do to try and lose next Monday against the 0-10 Dolphins.
Sincerely,
My eyes are bleeding in Portland
Seeing as how most of you decided not to show up yesterday in New York, I just wanted to let you guys know what happened. You just lost to the Jets. The same Jets that hadn't won a game against anybody but the Miami Dolphins this year. You once again shit the bed against the worst rush defenses in the league. Willie Parker, the NFL's second leading rusher just gained a mere 52 yards against the Jets. Big Ben had a serviceable day, other than those fumbles and the classic "force a pass into double coverage" interception that he manages to pull off about once a game. It couldn't have been easy on him though, what with the Jets up his ass the entire game. You just allowed seven sacks by the Jets. Yes this is the same New York Jets that was ranked 30th in overall defense and dead last against the run. Right now Joey Porter is sitting in South Beach salivating at the thought of the 17 sacks he's going to register next week when he returns to Pittsburgh for his first game against his old team.
Don't worry Defense, I didn't forget about you. You just gave up 150+ yards rushing to the Jets. Even worse, you just allowed Thomas Jones to rack up 117 yards against what was, a mere 24 hours ago, the leagues best defense. The first 100 yard game by a rusher since 2005. 35 games since a running back had put up 100 yards against the vaunted Steelers defense. Since then you've faced running backs the likes of LaDanian Tomlinson, Shaun Alexander, Larry Johnson, Edgerrin James, and numerous other talented running backs who weren't playing for the Jets. You just let Kellen fucking Clemens eat you alive on a 4th quarter game-tying drive. And the only reason it was a game-tying drive and not a game-winning drive is because Brad Smith had trouble with one of those pesky Clemens passes that bounced off his hands.
You don't lose to the Jets without a complete team effort though. Luckily, the special teams came through with breakdown just in time to hand the Jets the game. I was impressed with the way you handled kick coverages during the game, I almost thought maybe you'd learned your lesson after that debacle last week against the Browns. But then you decided to let the Jets return a punt into field goal territory in overtime. 3 short runs later and the Jets ended the misery with an easy 38 yard field goal.
I tell you what, I'm really excited to see what you guys do to try and lose next Monday against the 0-10 Dolphins.
Sincerely,
My eyes are bleeding in Portland
Friday, November 16, 2007
Week 11 Picks
At 5:00 Wednesday afternoon I was wrapping up at my real job with a nice little plan for the evening. I had six pack chilling in the fridge next to a fat rib-eye that had been marinating for almost 24 hours. I was going to drink, eat, and watch the Blazers eventually lose to the Nuggets and catch up on a little "Shot of Love with Tila Tequila"(By the way, whether you watch the show or not, do yourself a favor and watch the last 10 minutes of the most recent episode. You won't be disappointed). I was completely unaware that Rob Zombie and Ozzie Osbourne were even playing in the Rose Garden that night. Less than 4 hours later, I was standing stage left, 10 rows up, drowning in a sea of vodka/red bulls, bare titties(ranging from sagging 40 year old tits to 25 year old fake, pierced DD's), and enough ahem, alternative smoke, to make Ricky Williams cough up a lung. All of this courtesy of some guy I'd never met who had given tickets to a co-worker of a friend's elementary school buddy who happened to be in town from Denver for an entomological conference. I don't know what you had to do to get those tickets Cheryl, but it was worth it. Next thing I know Ozzie is baring his ass to the crowd(how is it that the Prince of Darkness has an ass white enough to blind a polar bear?), and then we're on the train home with a 60 year old guy who insists we hold his glass eye while he tries to talk a drunk chick into taking off her black hot pants and giving us all a dance. God damn life is random!
None of that has anything to do with sports or football, but it makes for a helluva better story than trying to explain how I went 2-12 in my picks last week.
Raiders +5 over VIKINGS - Purple Jesus didn't rise from injured list after 3 days, and Chester Taylor and Tavaris Jackson won't beat the Raiders without him
EAGLES -10 over Dolphins - If the Dolphins go 0-16 the same year as the Patriots go 19-0, will the remaining members of the 1972 Dolphins all commit seppuku?
JAGUARS -2.5 over Chargers - So you beat the Colts on a night when Manning threw 6 picks and Vinatieri missed a 29 yarder? Sorry still no love for you Norv
RAVENS +3 over Browns - Everyone is awfully impressed that the Browns almost beat the Steelers. But they still gave up 400 yards to the Steelers while only getting 163 yards from scrimmage.
Saints pick over TEXANS - Reggie Bush vs Mario Williams is the only mildly interesting thing about this game
Giants +3 over LIONS - Has Tom Coughlin's annual year end implosion started yet? Or can they squeak out win over the God's favorite quarterback?
PACKERS -9.5 over Panthers - The Packers are bound to start disappointing us soon, but at home in November against a shitty warm weather team? I'll take Favre in the battle of the geriatric quarterbacks.
COLTS -14.5 over Chiefs - Does this look like the face of someone who is going to let the Chiefs stay within 3 touchdowns of him?
Steelers -9.5 over JETS - I don't see Tomlin making the mistake of holding back on the run game against a shitty run defense like he did in Denver. Even Davenport is going to get some yards this week
Rams -3 over 49ERS - I must still have a contact high from the Ozzie concert to pick the Rams as road favorites against anybody but Notre Dame.
SEAHAWKS -5.5 over Bears - Sexy Rexy is back!! Before last weeks game Mike Holmgren said he was going to start passing more. Nice Mike, way to step up and really make your point. This might have carried a little weight if you had said it before Shaun Alexander got hurt. As for you Shaun, you notice how Morris hit the holes and actually tried to gain yardage? You might give that a shot instead of pussy-footing up the line and falling over sideways all the time. DISCLAIMER: If Shaun Alexander starts this game, consider this a Bears pick.
COWBOYS -10.5 over Redskins - 11 points is a pretty big spread, but I don't see the Cowboys losing to a division rival at home this year.
Patriots -16 over BILLS - The Patriots have only missed one cover this year, and that was only because Belichick decided to run out the clock instead of kicking field goal against the Colts.
Season: 60-76-9
Money Picks*
Bucs -3 over FALCONS - The dirty birds have snuck out 2 wins in a row...against the Panthers and the 49ers. Add one more win over the Texans and I still see a very bad team
Cardinals +3.5 over BENGALS - Whisenhunt knows the Bengals as well as any team in the league, plus the Bengals are really really shitty
Titans +2 over BRONCOS - Broncos still have no run defense, as long as Jeff Fisher doesn't pull a Tomlin and have Vince Young go pass-happy the Titans should win this one outright.
Season: 16-23
* Note: 5 out of 5 doctors recommend NOT following this advice. If you value your money at all, you should seriously consider NOT betting on the advice of an anonymous internet blogger.
None of that has anything to do with sports or football, but it makes for a helluva better story than trying to explain how I went 2-12 in my picks last week.
Raiders +5 over VIKINGS - Purple Jesus didn't rise from injured list after 3 days, and Chester Taylor and Tavaris Jackson won't beat the Raiders without him
EAGLES -10 over Dolphins - If the Dolphins go 0-16 the same year as the Patriots go 19-0, will the remaining members of the 1972 Dolphins all commit seppuku?
JAGUARS -2.5 over Chargers - So you beat the Colts on a night when Manning threw 6 picks and Vinatieri missed a 29 yarder? Sorry still no love for you Norv
RAVENS +3 over Browns - Everyone is awfully impressed that the Browns almost beat the Steelers. But they still gave up 400 yards to the Steelers while only getting 163 yards from scrimmage.
Saints pick over TEXANS - Reggie Bush vs Mario Williams is the only mildly interesting thing about this game
Giants +3 over LIONS - Has Tom Coughlin's annual year end implosion started yet? Or can they squeak out win over the God's favorite quarterback?
PACKERS -9.5 over Panthers - The Packers are bound to start disappointing us soon, but at home in November against a shitty warm weather team? I'll take Favre in the battle of the geriatric quarterbacks.
COLTS -14.5 over Chiefs - Does this look like the face of someone who is going to let the Chiefs stay within 3 touchdowns of him?
Steelers -9.5 over JETS - I don't see Tomlin making the mistake of holding back on the run game against a shitty run defense like he did in Denver. Even Davenport is going to get some yards this week
Rams -3 over 49ERS - I must still have a contact high from the Ozzie concert to pick the Rams as road favorites against anybody but Notre Dame.
SEAHAWKS -5.5 over Bears - Sexy Rexy is back!! Before last weeks game Mike Holmgren said he was going to start passing more. Nice Mike, way to step up and really make your point. This might have carried a little weight if you had said it before Shaun Alexander got hurt. As for you Shaun, you notice how Morris hit the holes and actually tried to gain yardage? You might give that a shot instead of pussy-footing up the line and falling over sideways all the time. DISCLAIMER: If Shaun Alexander starts this game, consider this a Bears pick.
COWBOYS -10.5 over Redskins - 11 points is a pretty big spread, but I don't see the Cowboys losing to a division rival at home this year.
Patriots -16 over BILLS - The Patriots have only missed one cover this year, and that was only because Belichick decided to run out the clock instead of kicking field goal against the Colts.
Season: 60-76-9
Money Picks*
Bucs -3 over FALCONS - The dirty birds have snuck out 2 wins in a row...against the Panthers and the 49ers. Add one more win over the Texans and I still see a very bad team
Cardinals +3.5 over BENGALS - Whisenhunt knows the Bengals as well as any team in the league, plus the Bengals are really really shitty
Titans +2 over BRONCOS - Broncos still have no run defense, as long as Jeff Fisher doesn't pull a Tomlin and have Vince Young go pass-happy the Titans should win this one outright.
Season: 16-23
* Note: 5 out of 5 doctors recommend NOT following this advice. If you value your money at all, you should seriously consider NOT betting on the advice of an anonymous internet blogger.
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
Rip City is Back??
Well maybe that's a bit premature, but the Blazers picked up another win last night to move above .500 for the first time in almost exactly a year(They fell to the Timberwolves last November 14th to fall to 4-4, it was all downhill from there). So far the Blazers are a perfect 4-0 at home, but have yet to win in their three tries on the road. They'll get another chance tonight when they travel to Denver to take on the Nuggets. The Blazers lost both games they played in Denver last year and have lost 9 of 10 there dating back to the 2002-2003 season. A win tonight would move the Blazers up to second in the division behind the Utah Jazz.
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
Pittsburgh pulls it out
Wow, what a weekend!! Before I get to the Steelers trip, I want to say congrats to the Blazers and the Portland crowd. I missed the home opener, but got to the second game against Memphis. last Friday the night before I left for Pittsburgh. It was Oden bobblehead night, and the first 10,000 fans got one. I've been going to Blazer games for 2.5 years and have never once seen 10,000 fans at a game, but figured this might be a slightly larger crowsd so I showed up 20 minutes early. I knew something was up when the two cheapest levels of tickets were sold out and I had to shell out $26 bucks apiece for tickets. I didn't get a bobblehead and when I sat in my seat it was easy to see why, I probably wasn't even in the first 15,000 fans. The Blazers looked like the Blazers of the last couple years in the first half. Defensively they couldn't stop much of anything, and took a 12 point deficit into halftime. They came out fired up for the second half though and immediately went on a 13-2 run and stayed locked down on D the rest of the game. The 2nd half crowd was bigger, louder, and more enthusiastic than any crowd I've ever seen in the Rose Garden. After taking the lead with about 7 minutes left in the game, Portland continued a dominating second half effort to win 110-98(Chalupas!!) The new starting lineup with Blake at point guard and Jarrett Jack coming off the bench seems to be working, as the Blazers have now won 3 straight after dropping their first three, including their first win over Dallas in 14 tries.
Pittsburgh Trip
The pilgrimage to Heinz Field was even more amazing. I switched planes in Minneapolis and immediately started seeing large swaths of Black & Gold. After downing some beers with a dude from Calgary dressed in snakeskin boots, a stetson, and a leather Steelers jacket, I boarded the plane to Pittsburgh that consisted of about 95% people going to the game. I got off the plane and was greeted by none other than Franco Harris...or at least a statue of Franco.
Franco Striking a pose in the Airport
I met up with the little bro and grandpa waiting for me and headed back to the pad. As soon as we walked in the door my Grandpa offered me a drink so I accepted a glass of the dirty bird and he started pouring. At about the 3 fingers mark I told him to hold up, but he ignored me and poured another 3. Ten minutes later I was halfway done with it and he asked why I was taking it so slow.
After dinner we headed up to Mount Washington, but the stadium wasn't lit up so we couldn't see much. Instead we went home for more drinks and watched the Penguins lose again.
We woke up in the morning to a wonderful thing...something besides Seahawks gameday coverage in the newspaper. After a late breakfast we headed to the game.
Apache Longbows in a Veterans Day Flyover
Opening Kickoff
Late Game Crowd
As we were sitting in our seats watching as the stadium started filling up, our Grandpa leans over and says "Damn, I've never seen so many fat girls in my life." Yup, that about says it all. The AFC North isn't exactly known for its crowd aesthetics. But on the plus side, we saw very few of those gay-ass pink jerseys.
I gotta say though, the upper endzone seats in that stadium may be the best seats in the house. Your plenty close to the action and from behind the endzone you see everything. You see the running lanes open and close in the blink of an eye, the passing routes develop and the seams in the zone coverage shift. When Ben threw an interception in the first half for example, we all knew it was a pick before he even threw it. He'd tried the same pass a couple times already and had been lucky to get away with incompletions. I've seen plenty of high school and college games live, and they don't even begin to compare. There's so much going on on the field, TV can't even begin to do it justice.
As for the game, well the first half wasn't pretty. The defense played really well despite giving up 4 touchdowns. In reality, only one of those came off a sustained drive by the Cleveland offense. They got the other three thanks to the Big Ben int deep in Pittsburgh territory and a 91 yard kickoff return by Josh Cribbs that gave them a first and goal and another Cribbs return for a TD. In all, Cribbs had 40 more return yards(204) than the Browns entire offense was able to get(163). The pass rush continued to be mediocre, and they didn't get a single sack. LeBeau seemed to be more concerned with preventing the big play rather than getting to Derek Anderson. Polamolu was playing back in coverage most of the game and rarely blitzed. The plan worked though as they kept Braylon Edwards to only one catch in the game(but holy shit was it a good one) and Kellen Winslow to just 46 yards.
The offense left more to be desired. They were unable to punch it in the endzone and had to settle for three field goals to go into half time with a 21-9 deficit. The mood was somber at halftime, but soon picked up as it became obvious in the 2nd half that the Browns were going to have trouble scoring any more points. Ben and the offense soon found their groove too, and Ben passed for two touchdowns and a two point conversion and rushed 30 yards on 3rd down for another score. He set up one of his TD passes with another 3rd down run to give the Steelers a first and goal.
It was an extremely tense 4th quarter. After Roethlisberger ran for a 30 yard score to put the Steelers up, the Josh Cribbs took the ensuing kickoff 100 yards after muffing it to put the Browns up again and temporarily silence the crowd. On the next drive Ben took the good guys down the field for the go-ahead score, and after a Romeo Crennel screw up on the challenge of the scoring play, the Browns were left with only 1 timeout and had to settle for a 53 yard field goal attempt in the worst kicking endzone in the NFL. The kick fell short and the Steelers were victorious and opened up a 2 game lead in the AFC North.
Out of fear of jinxing the Steelers, I will avoid mentioning that with the
Colts loss on Sunday(Viniateri misses a 29 yard game winner? WTF?), the
Steelers are now the #2 seed in the AFC by virtue of a tiebreaker over the
Colts.
The trip home was uneventful other than having to spend 17 hours in airports and on planes thanks mostly to a 6 hour layover in Minneapolis. With 6 hours, it was going to be impossible to avoid using the restroom, but I was able to avoid getting arrested for gay sex buy following three simple rules:
Pittsburgh Trip
The pilgrimage to Heinz Field was even more amazing. I switched planes in Minneapolis and immediately started seeing large swaths of Black & Gold. After downing some beers with a dude from Calgary dressed in snakeskin boots, a stetson, and a leather Steelers jacket, I boarded the plane to Pittsburgh that consisted of about 95% people going to the game. I got off the plane and was greeted by none other than Franco Harris...or at least a statue of Franco.
Franco Striking a pose in the Airport
I met up with the little bro and grandpa waiting for me and headed back to the pad. As soon as we walked in the door my Grandpa offered me a drink so I accepted a glass of the dirty bird and he started pouring. At about the 3 fingers mark I told him to hold up, but he ignored me and poured another 3. Ten minutes later I was halfway done with it and he asked why I was taking it so slow.
After dinner we headed up to Mount Washington, but the stadium wasn't lit up so we couldn't see much. Instead we went home for more drinks and watched the Penguins lose again.
We woke up in the morning to a wonderful thing...something besides Seahawks gameday coverage in the newspaper. After a late breakfast we headed to the game.
Apache Longbows in a Veterans Day Flyover
Opening Kickoff
Late Game Crowd
As we were sitting in our seats watching as the stadium started filling up, our Grandpa leans over and says "Damn, I've never seen so many fat girls in my life." Yup, that about says it all. The AFC North isn't exactly known for its crowd aesthetics. But on the plus side, we saw very few of those gay-ass pink jerseys.
I gotta say though, the upper endzone seats in that stadium may be the best seats in the house. Your plenty close to the action and from behind the endzone you see everything. You see the running lanes open and close in the blink of an eye, the passing routes develop and the seams in the zone coverage shift. When Ben threw an interception in the first half for example, we all knew it was a pick before he even threw it. He'd tried the same pass a couple times already and had been lucky to get away with incompletions. I've seen plenty of high school and college games live, and they don't even begin to compare. There's so much going on on the field, TV can't even begin to do it justice.
As for the game, well the first half wasn't pretty. The defense played really well despite giving up 4 touchdowns. In reality, only one of those came off a sustained drive by the Cleveland offense. They got the other three thanks to the Big Ben int deep in Pittsburgh territory and a 91 yard kickoff return by Josh Cribbs that gave them a first and goal and another Cribbs return for a TD. In all, Cribbs had 40 more return yards(204) than the Browns entire offense was able to get(163). The pass rush continued to be mediocre, and they didn't get a single sack. LeBeau seemed to be more concerned with preventing the big play rather than getting to Derek Anderson. Polamolu was playing back in coverage most of the game and rarely blitzed. The plan worked though as they kept Braylon Edwards to only one catch in the game(but holy shit was it a good one) and Kellen Winslow to just 46 yards.
The offense left more to be desired. They were unable to punch it in the endzone and had to settle for three field goals to go into half time with a 21-9 deficit. The mood was somber at halftime, but soon picked up as it became obvious in the 2nd half that the Browns were going to have trouble scoring any more points. Ben and the offense soon found their groove too, and Ben passed for two touchdowns and a two point conversion and rushed 30 yards on 3rd down for another score. He set up one of his TD passes with another 3rd down run to give the Steelers a first and goal.
It was an extremely tense 4th quarter. After Roethlisberger ran for a 30 yard score to put the Steelers up, the Josh Cribbs took the ensuing kickoff 100 yards after muffing it to put the Browns up again and temporarily silence the crowd. On the next drive Ben took the good guys down the field for the go-ahead score, and after a Romeo Crennel screw up on the challenge of the scoring play, the Browns were left with only 1 timeout and had to settle for a 53 yard field goal attempt in the worst kicking endzone in the NFL. The kick fell short and the Steelers were victorious and opened up a 2 game lead in the AFC North.
Out of fear of jinxing the Steelers, I will avoid mentioning that with the
Colts loss on Sunday(Viniateri misses a 29 yard game winner? WTF?), the
Steelers are now the #2 seed in the AFC by virtue of a tiebreaker over the
Colts.
The trip home was uneventful other than having to spend 17 hours in airports and on planes thanks mostly to a 6 hour layover in Minneapolis. With 6 hours, it was going to be impossible to avoid using the restroom, but I was able to avoid getting arrested for gay sex buy following three simple rules:
- Keep your stance as narrow as possible: At the very least you should keep your feet in your own stall.
- Keep your toe-tapping to a minimum: If it helps, maybe turn off your ipod for a few minutes.
- Watch your hand-placement: The most important thing to remember here is to keep your hands above the bottom of the stall wall
Friday, November 9, 2007
Tomlin is our Coach
This is the Steelers Head Coach. How can you not be excited? He is one bad-ass lookin dude
Thursday, November 8, 2007
Heinz Field, Here We Come!
The Bandit and the Lieutenant are making their virgin pilgrimage to the Ketchup Mecca this weekend to see the Steelers and the Brown battle it out for the AFC North title. I know Browns fans are all excited. Just because you've won a few games against mediocre teams doesn't change the fact that the Steelers handed you a 34-7 opening day loss. That loss was just the latest of 8 straight losses the Browns have suffered at the hands of the Black & Gold, and you can expect that number to be 9 by Sunday night. If you want a little more history, the Browns have won only once in the last 15 tries. Thanks to Ryan for the video preview of Sunday's game. I should have some photos to post on Tuesday.
Luckily we'll all get a well-needed respite from the still-undefeated Patriots as they use their bye weekend to sacrifice some Boston-area virgins to the devil as payment for their come-from-behind victory over the Colts last week. We'll have to see how long they keep it up, they must be running out of Boston virgins. There were only 17 of them to begin with and I'm pretty sure the Red Sox and Celtics have used a few of those already. So while we're down to only one undefeated team, we still have two defeated teams making a push to improve on the 1976 Buccaneers standard of inferiority as the only team to not win a game in a season. What's even more exciting is that since these two teams don't play each other this year, we might very well see both teams go 0-16.
I got back to my losing ways again last week, going just 5-9 but managing a 2-2 on the money picks, with the teaser once again failing me.
Bills -2.5 over DOLPHINS - I am officially more interested in whether a team can go winless this year than I am if the Patriots can go undefeated
SAINTS -11.5 over Rams - Ditto. Plus the Saints seem to have found their stride and are rolling over opponents like(insert hurricane joke here)
STEELERS -10 over Browns - Before you start thinking this spread is too high, remember the Browns wins have come over opponents with a combined 10-26 record and not one team that is currently above .500
REDSKINS -2.5 over Eagles - The Redskins are still in the hunt for the NFC East at 5-3, but they're gonna have to get alot better on offense to overtake the Giants and the Cowboys
Vikings +6 over PACKERS - Jesus walked on water, Purple Jesus shouldn't have any trouble with the Frozen Tundra
Broncos +3 over CHIEFS - the "meh, whatever" game of the week
RAVENS -4 over Bengals - Until 30 seconds ago I had the Bengals, but it doesn't matter. Even the Bengals and Ravens fans will be watching the Giants/Cowboys matchup
RAIDERS +3.5 over Bears - When do we get to see Kyle Orton?
Colts -3.5 over CHARGERS - The Colts won't be able to pipe crowd noise into this stadium, but luckily for them Norv Turner still doesn't realize he has LT on his team
49ers +10 over SEAHAWKS - Until the Walrus proves he can think about something other than where his next bucket of smelt is coming from I can't pick them. Especially not as 10 point favorites
Season: 58-62-9
Money Picks*
PANTHERS -4 over Falcons - Vinny's back!! maybe
TITANS -4 over Jaguars - The Titans are 6-2 despite Vince Young really not doing much. If he gets his mojo back, watch out
Lions -1 over CARDINALS - After a promising start, the Cardinals are back to normal. The Lord's Team continues along towards a divinely inspired 10 wins
GIANTS +2 over Cowboys - Two of the few bright spots in a very mediocre NFC. Giants look for revenge after their week 1 shootout loss
Season: 16-19
* Note: 5 out of 5 doctors recommend NOT following this advice. If you value your money at all, you should seriously consider NOT betting on the advice of an anonymous internet blogger.
Tuesday, November 6, 2007
MNF Video Clips
Here's the Mel Blount comments on the Baltimore offense from last nights game
Here is the block Hines Ward layed on Ed Reed
Unfortunately I can't find a clip of Ron Jaworski's strokin it comment or of James Harrison's hit on Ed Reed's return. If I find them later I'll put them up.
And just for shits and giggles, here's a little baseball talk. The boys over at Where Have You Gone, Andy Van Slyke break down the new Pirates manager, John Russell. I don't know shit about this guy except that he used to be the Pirates third base coach and led the Ottawa Lynx to a very Pittsburgh Pirate-like record of 55-88 last year.
Here is the block Hines Ward layed on Ed Reed
Unfortunately I can't find a clip of Ron Jaworski's strokin it comment or of James Harrison's hit on Ed Reed's return. If I find them later I'll put them up.
And just for shits and giggles, here's a little baseball talk. The boys over at Where Have You Gone, Andy Van Slyke break down the new Pirates manager, John Russell. I don't know shit about this guy except that he used to be the Pirates third base coach and led the Ottawa Lynx to a very Pittsburgh Pirate-like record of 55-88 last year.
Joey Porter Who??
James Harrison. A former undrafted free agent, NFL Europe player, and NFL special teamer who has been cut in the past by both the Pittsburgh Steelers and the Baltimore Ravens, and current Steeler linebacker who earned a fulltime starting position with the departure of Joey Porter in the offseason, proved last night he is more than deserving of being a starting NFL linebacker. Harrison single-handedly tore the shit out of the Baltimore offense last night, racking up 9 tackles, 3.5 sacks, 2 forced fumbles, a fumble recovery, and an interception. On one of the fumbles he forced, Harrison hit Baltimore safety Ed Reed so hard the ball flew 15' in the air before rookie Lawrence Timmons hauled in the recovery. Reed's night of pain wasn't over, as later in the game Hines Ward hit him with an open field block that dropped him like a rock. Even though the play wasn't over yet, Ward turned to the Baltimore sidelines and waved for the trainer almost before Reed hit the ground. Reed left the game shaken up, but would later return.
It wasn't all defense though, as Big Ben tossed 5 TD's...in the first half. It tied the Steelers franchise record for TD's in an entire game. Later in the game, Ben landed awkwardly on his right hip and had to be helped off the field. Ben would later return for several plays to prove he was alright.
During halftime of the game, the Steelers celebrated their 75th Anniversary team with greats like Terry Bradshaw, Franco Harris, John Stallworth, Lynn Swann, Jack Lambert, Joe Greene, Mel Blount, and more wearing Steelers throwbacks and being introduced at halftime. Mel Blount, a former Steel Curtain cornerback, called out the Baltimore offense during an interview in the 2nd half. When asked what he thought of it, he didn't sugar coat it, calling Baltimore "embarrassing" and "pathetic" as a professional team.
Perhaps the funniest moment of the night came early in the third quarter when discussing Big Ben's amazing first half stats. Ron Jaworski was apparently impressed, saying to Kornheiser, "Big Ben was stroking it in the first half Tony." This was followed by several seconds of awkward silence before Ron continued, "He even got you excited." Followed by even more silence. I'm not sure what was going on up in that booth, but I'm glad they didn't switch to the in-booth camera.
It wasn't all defense though, as Big Ben tossed 5 TD's...in the first half. It tied the Steelers franchise record for TD's in an entire game. Later in the game, Ben landed awkwardly on his right hip and had to be helped off the field. Ben would later return for several plays to prove he was alright.
During halftime of the game, the Steelers celebrated their 75th Anniversary team with greats like Terry Bradshaw, Franco Harris, John Stallworth, Lynn Swann, Jack Lambert, Joe Greene, Mel Blount, and more wearing Steelers throwbacks and being introduced at halftime. Mel Blount, a former Steel Curtain cornerback, called out the Baltimore offense during an interview in the 2nd half. When asked what he thought of it, he didn't sugar coat it, calling Baltimore "embarrassing" and "pathetic" as a professional team.
Perhaps the funniest moment of the night came early in the third quarter when discussing Big Ben's amazing first half stats. Ron Jaworski was apparently impressed, saying to Kornheiser, "Big Ben was stroking it in the first half Tony." This was followed by several seconds of awkward silence before Ron continued, "He even got you excited." Followed by even more silence. I'm not sure what was going on up in that booth, but I'm glad they didn't switch to the in-booth camera.
Monday, November 5, 2007
F you, and you, and you
Lets start with the big one, Fuck you Bill Belichick. Fine, so you won, I could really care less, but why hold off on the F-U score in this game. The spread is 6 points, your up by 4 in field goal range and you fucking kneel down 3 straight times? Kick the goddamn field goal and cover the spread you sleeveless asshole.
Fuck you Mike Holmgren. You walrus-looking pussy. 4th and half a yard, in sudden death overtime, getting close to field goal range. I applauded you for going for it. After all, you used to be a good coach, you can get a half yard when you need it the most right? It's simple here, just sneak Hasselback right behind the center and you've got a first down. Or if you want to get gutsy, throw a little wide receiver automatic to the sideline out of the spread formation you decided to use. At least if you miss that you've shown some balls. But no, instead you decide to pull some weak-ass delay handoff up the middle for a loss of a yard. 2 minutes later and you just lost the game to the Browns who are now only a half game back of Pittsburgh in the AFC North. You better start sucking alot of dick if you want to have a job at the end of this year.
Fuck you Chargers. You get the light version of the fuck you this week, because despite your best efforts I still managed a fantasy league win with Philip Rivers starting. Did someone forget to tell you that the Vikings have one of the worst pass defenses in the league? I guess I can't blame you for trying to run all day with LT. Philip Rivers may not have made many good throws yesterday, but when he did toss a catchable one, the receivers invariably managed to fuck it up. But still, you do realize that there are more ways to run than straight up the middle against one of the stoutest defensive lines in the league. Maybe try the occasional screen pass or pitchout and let LT get to the outside and do what he does best.
Fuck you Mike Holmgren. You walrus-looking pussy. 4th and half a yard, in sudden death overtime, getting close to field goal range. I applauded you for going for it. After all, you used to be a good coach, you can get a half yard when you need it the most right? It's simple here, just sneak Hasselback right behind the center and you've got a first down. Or if you want to get gutsy, throw a little wide receiver automatic to the sideline out of the spread formation you decided to use. At least if you miss that you've shown some balls. But no, instead you decide to pull some weak-ass delay handoff up the middle for a loss of a yard. 2 minutes later and you just lost the game to the Browns who are now only a half game back of Pittsburgh in the AFC North. You better start sucking alot of dick if you want to have a job at the end of this year.
Fuck you Chargers. You get the light version of the fuck you this week, because despite your best efforts I still managed a fantasy league win with Philip Rivers starting. Did someone forget to tell you that the Vikings have one of the worst pass defenses in the league? I guess I can't blame you for trying to run all day with LT. Philip Rivers may not have made many good throws yesterday, but when he did toss a catchable one, the receivers invariably managed to fuck it up. But still, you do realize that there are more ways to run than straight up the middle against one of the stoutest defensive lines in the league. Maybe try the occasional screen pass or pitchout and let LT get to the outside and do what he does best.
Saturday, November 3, 2007
Navy 46-Notre Dame 44, 3OT
In honor of the Fighting Irish continuing their especially disappointing season by losing to Navy for the first time since 1963, I give you this little youtube gem...
Friday, November 2, 2007
Revenge on the Ravens
Pittsburgh gets the Monday Night game this week in a game that could end up deciding the AFC North. Last year the Ravens spanked the Steelers to the tune of a combined 58-7 score in the two games. Those also happened to be the only 2 games the Steelers lost out of their last 8 games. Luckily for us, this year will be different. The Ravens offensive woes continue, and the defense is starting to show their age(the Depends under the uniforms are a dead giveaway). And Roethlisberger is back on track after struggling most of last year, due mostly to the fact that he had 37 near death experiences.
There's also a pretty big game on Sunday too, I'm sure you've heard talk. That's right, RAIDERS vs TEXANS!! Lock up your children and wives and... Oh, that's not the one you're thinking of? I guess maybe you might want to take a look at the Patriots and Colts game, that one might get interesting. Seriously though, unless you haven't tuned into a single sports related media outlet in the last 3 weeks, you've heard everything there is to say about the Patriots/Colts matchup, and there's really nothing more that I can offer. I'm torn between who to root for in that one, so instead I'll be hoping for a giant asteroid to take out both teams. In the absence of armageddon, I think the Colts are going to have their hands full, so lets just hope that it's at least a close game. If the Patriots go out there and win 42-14 or something, we might all be wiped out by the impact from Gregg Easterbrook's head exploding.
Last week we had a better week, and just barely got back to .500 on the season. We did much better on the money picks though, going 3-1 and only missing on our teaser thanks to the Giants playing like pussies in the 2nd half.
SAINTS -3 over Jaguars: The Saints look to be back on track, this should be a good test for them
Redskins -3.5 over JETS: Kellen Clemens can't be any worse than Chad Pennington...or can he?
Cardinals +3.5 over BUCS: Both teams have lost 2 straight, but last weeks bye should help Kurt Warners elbow.
49ers +3.5 over FALCONS: Even the 49ers should be able to put up points against the Falcon defense, but with Gore still gimpy it could be a tough matchup
Seahawks +1.5 over BROWNS: This isn't so much a vote a confidence for the Seahawks, as it is just hoping the Browns lose
Patriots -5.5 over COLTS: I just don't think the Colts can win this one. If this spread was over 7 I'd probably go Colts.
Cowboys -3 over EAGLES: Romo just signed a huge contract and he's been banging Britney Spears. Picking the Cowboys over the Eagles might have been a bad idea
STEELERS -9 over Ravens: This is a bigger spread than I woulda hoped for, but I gotta go with the Black & Gold
RAIDERS -3 over Texans: Both teams have made huge strides since last year, I gotta go with the Raiders at home.
Broncos +3 over LIONS: Broncos played tough against Favre in last weeks OT loss, but can they beat the God-assisted Lions? I think so
Bengals +1.5 over BILLS: The Bengals defense sucks, but so does the Bills. And I don't think the Bills can score enough points to win this one.
Season: 53-53-9
Money Picks
Chargers -7 over VIKINGS: The Chargers should continue their hot(sorry, bad pun) streak against the Vikings poor pass defense
TITANS -4 over Panthers: It was fun while it lasted Vinny, but Carrs back now. Titans win
Packers -1.5 over CHIEFS: The Packers always struggle at Arrowhead, but they're too hot this year to lose this game
3 team road teaser(NOTE: all lines have been teased by 6 points)
Chargers -1 over VIKINGS
Broncos +9 over LIONS
Bengals +7.5 over BILLS
If you're feeling ballsy, you might try throwing the Packers in there too at +5.5
Season: 14-17
* Note: 5 out of 5 doctors recommend NOT following this advice. If you value your money at all, you should seriously consider NOT betting on the advice of an anonymous internet blogger.
There's also a pretty big game on Sunday too, I'm sure you've heard talk. That's right, RAIDERS vs TEXANS!! Lock up your children and wives and... Oh, that's not the one you're thinking of? I guess maybe you might want to take a look at the Patriots and Colts game, that one might get interesting. Seriously though, unless you haven't tuned into a single sports related media outlet in the last 3 weeks, you've heard everything there is to say about the Patriots/Colts matchup, and there's really nothing more that I can offer. I'm torn between who to root for in that one, so instead I'll be hoping for a giant asteroid to take out both teams. In the absence of armageddon, I think the Colts are going to have their hands full, so lets just hope that it's at least a close game. If the Patriots go out there and win 42-14 or something, we might all be wiped out by the impact from Gregg Easterbrook's head exploding.
Last week we had a better week, and just barely got back to .500 on the season. We did much better on the money picks though, going 3-1 and only missing on our teaser thanks to the Giants playing like pussies in the 2nd half.
SAINTS -3 over Jaguars: The Saints look to be back on track, this should be a good test for them
Redskins -3.5 over JETS: Kellen Clemens can't be any worse than Chad Pennington...or can he?
Cardinals +3.5 over BUCS: Both teams have lost 2 straight, but last weeks bye should help Kurt Warners elbow.
49ers +3.5 over FALCONS: Even the 49ers should be able to put up points against the Falcon defense, but with Gore still gimpy it could be a tough matchup
Seahawks +1.5 over BROWNS: This isn't so much a vote a confidence for the Seahawks, as it is just hoping the Browns lose
Patriots -5.5 over COLTS: I just don't think the Colts can win this one. If this spread was over 7 I'd probably go Colts.
Cowboys -3 over EAGLES: Romo just signed a huge contract and he's been banging Britney Spears. Picking the Cowboys over the Eagles might have been a bad idea
STEELERS -9 over Ravens: This is a bigger spread than I woulda hoped for, but I gotta go with the Black & Gold
RAIDERS -3 over Texans: Both teams have made huge strides since last year, I gotta go with the Raiders at home.
Broncos +3 over LIONS: Broncos played tough against Favre in last weeks OT loss, but can they beat the God-assisted Lions? I think so
Bengals +1.5 over BILLS: The Bengals defense sucks, but so does the Bills. And I don't think the Bills can score enough points to win this one.
Season: 53-53-9
Money Picks
Chargers -7 over VIKINGS: The Chargers should continue their hot(sorry, bad pun) streak against the Vikings poor pass defense
TITANS -4 over Panthers: It was fun while it lasted Vinny, but Carrs back now. Titans win
Packers -1.5 over CHIEFS: The Packers always struggle at Arrowhead, but they're too hot this year to lose this game
3 team road teaser(NOTE: all lines have been teased by 6 points)
Chargers -1 over VIKINGS
Broncos +9 over LIONS
Bengals +7.5 over BILLS
If you're feeling ballsy, you might try throwing the Packers in there too at +5.5
Season: 14-17
* Note: 5 out of 5 doctors recommend NOT following this advice. If you value your money at all, you should seriously consider NOT betting on the advice of an anonymous internet blogger.
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